long, hot showers

i'm sitting in the shower 'cause i've lost the will to stand
and everything i've planned
is raining down on me today
God laughs, we say
but still we pray for just one thing to really call our own
i won't this time
i don't need anyone at all
i don't need anything

i'm laying in the shower 'cause i want to wash away
myself or all the stains
don't care much, either way
it only hurts when i'm awake
i'm not okay, but thanks
i don't need anything today
i don't need anyone

i'm freezing in the shower - the water's turning cold
i'm still not feeling bold enough
i'm guessing you won't call my bluff
but i've been wrong before
i'll shiver one day more
don't teach me strength today, God
tomorrow i'll be ready
i'll be standing steady then
so please, God, one day more