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cold, calculating heart break |
“Have you seen the end of garden state? Where the guy is leaving and the girl is all teary, guess what, thats me, I’m her. You are fucking leaving me just to find your self. He comes back to her, to find her crying - I wont be here to come back to if you actually leave. You know that, and are going to do it anyways. How can I look at you the same knowing what you will do? I can’t just hug your tears...fears and spare time away anymore. I might be able to say that I forgive it and just want to see you happy, but I don’t, can’t to my core. I am too insulted, un-nerved and struck by your lack of effort towards building a future with me to do the things that you want me to do for you. I just don’t love you after this. I am sorry, truly, truly sorry. In fact, much to my dismay, I don’t think that I am capable of being a nice guy around you. I’ve changed, already. My way is set.” I look downward, but can’t suppress the smile. The combination of being humbled, embarrassed and flattered all at once by this boy was just too much. My smile must of been flirty because he looked aghast as he tried to stare me down. What a dork, I killed my smile. If I were meaner, I would seduce him again with faint promises of love or passion. I could stomp on his heart, maybe even traumatize him. I wouldn’t even have to go that far, I could probably keep him for as long as I wanted just by maneuvering next to him during a movie proposed as an innocent get together. The power is there, if I want it. “Look, I’m sorry. You know what, fine, pout. Be the girl crying, but don’t try to pin your tears on me. It wont work, you are only feeling sorry for your self. His jaw dropped a little, as he chilled to accommodate the cold reality. I turned before I could see the rest of his reaction, and stalked off to muse. |