JENNY Chapter 5 (new)

                                     
                                        Jenny

                                      Chapter 5


Jenny seemed to become withdrawn hardly talking to Pete, she stood glancing out of the window sighing. The sun beamed onto her face, Pete walked into the room standing beside her.

"Its really nice today, I might take you out." He said glancing at her. "Would you like that?" She sat on the coach thinking for a few minutes eventually lighting a cigarette. He sat beside her. "I think, I'll check you." He paused. "If your OK, I'll take you home." He walked into the bedroom pausing at the door. "Come on, lets get it over with." She reluctantly walked into the bedroom allowing him to examine her. "Your OK, I'll phone your parents." He walked into the lounge hoping she would follow.

"Can we go to the park?" She stood at the bedroom door as she spoke. "I've been in this flat for 3 days, I need to get out." He handed her a cigarette pausing for a few seconds wanting to hold her. "I don't want one." She snapped picking up her jacket walking towards the door.

They walked to the park silently, sitting on a bench beside the lake. Jenny walked to the edge gazing at the middle of the mass of water silently causing him concern, he stood beside her. She watched the ripples on the water slowly diminishing refusing to acknowledge his presence.

"What are you thinking about?" Pete asked quietly.

"I want to tell you how I feel, but I can't." She sighed. "Do you see those ripples." She pointed to the middle of the lake. "That's how I feel inside, the love is dying." She said quietly. He sat her down again.

"I don't mean my love, I needed you so much, I just wanted you to hold me." She lowered her head refusing to look at him. "I tried to work it out, and then I realized, Its because I've been with some one else, and that's the problem isn't it?" She hurried to the bridge pausing, He took her hand silently returning her to the bench he sat her down holding her gently.

"I can't say it doesn't bother me because it does." He turned her to face him wiping her tear stained face. "But!, Not the way you think, he forced you, raped you." He paused. "I love you, and I want you to believe that." Tears filled his eyes, she held him close unsure of her emotions.

"I wanted to feel the same as the first time you held me, I felt so good." She whispered, he held her gently silently thinking.

"How long have you felt like this Jen?" he paused thinking back to the conversation she run away from the day she left hospital. "I want you to stop thinking like this, we can work this out, can't we?" She nodded silently relieved to be in his arms. "If I could make love to you, I would believe me but its too soon." He lifted her chin gently. "I don't want to take any chances." The things she had said weighed heavy on his mind, hate for her attacker and Caroline knowing she held the answers to his unanswered questions, torn between hate and his medical ethics to save life.

"I think we should go into town. We can have some lunch." They walked the short distance walking into his favorite restaurant, he glanced at the menu.

"Pete." She paused he ordered the meal. "How can we." She sighed. "I just want us to be the same, like the first time we met." He held her hand gently.

"We haven't changed, its pyscological you have to stop thinking about the day you." Pete said quietly pausing for a few seconds holding her hand. "Do you love me?"  She looked shocked.

"You know I do." She stated curious about his question. The waiter placed their meals on the table disturbing the conversation, pouring the wine before leaving.

"If you love me, and I love you. I don't think we have to worry, do you?" He whispered. She shook her head silently Pete seemed so far away, a solitary tear ran down her face wanting to hold him, to tell him how much pain she held inside. They finished their meal silently, Jenny sat deep in thought wanting to hold him, wanting to feel loved once more. They returned to the flat Jenny unzipped her jacket sitting down beside him, he turned her to face him.

"Talk to me Jen, just explain how you feel." He held her gently. "If I know, I can help you." He whispered flicking her hair away from her face. "You look exhausted." He picked her up carrying her into the bedroom bouncing her on the bed. She laughed pausing glancing into his eyes thinking back to the times he held her, kissed her.

"Its not too soon." She whispered pulling him towards her sliding his T-shirt off, he teased her slowly, sirrius crept into her mind making her tremble, he kissed her neck softly.

"We don't have too." He whispered, she pulled him towards her before he could finish his sentence wanting to feel loved again. She lay quiet holding her stomach trying to hide the cramping pains. He stroked her body gently.

"Do you feel okay?" He asked concerned by her silence, she nodded silently forcing a weak smile. Pete opened the drawer shaking two tablets onto his hand handing them to her. "I want you take these, you can get up later the pain should go soon."

"How did you know?" She gasped, he turned her to face him gently.

"I know you, trust me." He stated holding her close, she closed her eyes falling asleep engulfed by the warmth from his body. He carefully got out of bed not wanting to wake her disturbed by his mobile phone, he sighed texting Jim quickly explaining they were having an early night, not wanting visitors. Jenny stood behind the coach her arms resting gently around his neck.

"You didn't have to tell Jim not come." She whispered hugging him.

"I wanted to spend the night with you." He replied as she sat beside him.

"How did you know my stomach hurt?" She asked curious. "I suppose its difficult to hide pain from a doctor isn't it?" Jenny stated.

"I thought you would think that, but like I said earlier, I know you." He kissed her on the cheek. "I know how you react to different things, and you never turn away from me." The doorbell interrupted him.

"I thought I said, I didn't want visitors tonight." Pete stated annoyed allowing Jim to enter, glancing outside the flat satisfying himself that Caroline wasn't with him.

"I'm sorry Pete." Jim paused clearly worried. "I need your advice Pete, I'm sorry Jen." They walked into the kitchen to talk. "I think you were right Caroline must be taking something, she looks terrible." Pete thought for a few minutes.

"I owe you too much not to help you." Pete stated. "To be honest, I'm having problems with Jen, well I don't mean serious problems nothing I can't handle."

"She still hasn't recovered from the assault." Jim stated concerned, Pete shook his head silently. "Why don't you take her to Scotland, get away for a few days." Jim asked.

"Maybe, in a few weeks." He paused, "Can you bring Caroline here later, If I can help her I will."

"Will Jenny be here, I'm not sure Caroline could defend herself." Jim asked quietly not wanting Jenny to hear. Pete stepped back shocked by his friends words Caroline had nearly killed Jenny, He subdued his anger returning to the lounge.

"Jenny wouldn't cause any problems." Pete stated searching for her concerned by her absence, she walked into the lounge a towel wrapped snug around her figure. "Do you think she will come with you?" Jim nodded silently.

"Have you two been plotting revenge again?" She sighed sitting beside Pete.

"No nothing like that, Jim wanted some advice about a medical matter." Pete stated closing the door as Jim left.

"Jim doesn't look ill." She said curious about Jims visit.

"He isn't, but Caroline might be. They should be here soon." He paused glancing at her, "I just want to check a few things, If she lets me, and no I don't like it before you say anything. I want you to stay away from her." She looked shocked walking into the bedroom silently, he sat beside her. "I'm only doing this for Jim."

"She fancies you, and you want me to stay away from her." She whispered her head lowered. "I can't do that."

"You know I don't like her but if Jim is right, she could be killing herself, should I just let her do it then?" He sighed trying to reason with her. "Do you think I would have a choice if I was at work, I don't want any fighting Jen."

"I don't want to fight, I just want to know why she lied to me." She stated annoyed walking into the bedroom to dress, he followed her silently.

"We will find out one day." He whispered comforting her. "She's probably jealous." The door bell interrupted him. "That should be them." Pete left her sitting on the bed knowing she would confront Caroline.

Jenny walked into the lounge glancing at Carolines painfully thin figure in disbelief, her once soft brown eyes now dark and sunken.

"Can i have a word with you Jen?" Pete said holding her arm gently leading her into the kitchen. "She looks terrible doesn't she, would you make us a coffee, I'll try to help her." He hugged her reassuringly before returning to his guests.

"Your not looking too good Caroline, whats wrong?" Pete asked attempting to look at her wrists but she pulled away.

"I'm okay, theres nothing wrong with me." Caroline snapped. Pete picked her bag up interrupting her.

"I suppose, I won't find the answer in here will I?" He asked quietly, Caroline attempted to snatch the bag from Petes grasp.

"Caroline, I won't take it away, I just want to know what you are taking." He said hurrying to the bedroom, Jim struggled to hold her as she attempted to follow Pete, he returned a few minutes later handing the bag to her.

"Do you realize you are killing yourself, I see this every day at work." Pete paused studying her. "If you want me to help you, I can." Caroline searched her bag relieved to find the heroine.

"I don't need your help." Caroline snapped hurrying to the bathroom.

"I've switched the heroine with a sedative just in case she didn't want help." He glanced at the bathroom turning to Jim. "I suggest you take her home." Pete stated quietly, Jim thanked him before leaving. Jenny walked into the lounge.

"You could have helped her." She handed him a coffee sitting beside him.

"I've tried, I can't help her if she doesn't want help, can I?" He tried to reason with her.

"So that's it, you are just going to let her kill herself." She snapped annoyed. Caroline filled her thoughts, he held her gently around the waist making her jump. "She might listen to me." She turned to face him.

"Jenny, listen to me she doesn't want help, and I don't really want you to talk to her." He paused knowing she was annoyed. "I nearly lost you." He said quietly attempting to hold her close but she pulled away annoying him. "You nearly died, can't you understand how I feel." Tears filled his eyes. She sat beside him again trying to think back to the day she was attacked unable to remember the events before arriving at the hospital.

"I can't remember." She sighed. "Tell me what happened." She stated curious.

"It doesn't matter, I don't want you to remember." He said quietly thinking back to the pain she suffered.

"I want to know Pete, and if you won't tell me. I'll ask Jim." She stated nervously.

"When we found you we had to cut you down, he had tied you to a metal grid." He turned her wrists gently showing her the marks from the rope. "You began to panic when I tried to cut you down, you thought I was Sirrius." He wiped the tears rolling freely down his face. "Jim cut you down I held you." He struggled to tell her choking back the tears. "You collapsed on the way to hospital." She wiped his face gently, hugging him. "I thought I'd lost you." He cried.

"I'm sorry, I just want to help her." She said quietly, he stroked her hair away from her face.

"She will probably get admitted to hospital, If she does she will get the help she needs." He paused wiping his face. "If its not to late." She sat thinking about what he had said.

"They don't all die, do they?" She asked clearly worried about Caroline.

"Some wise up and quit, but to be honest a lot do die." He sighed. "We could have a take-away or watch a movie." He ordered the movie before she could object trying to distract her from Caroline.

"Your returning to work next week, do I have to stay here on my own." She stated watching as he flicked through his diary.

"I'm on earlys, I should be home before you are awake." He laughed noticing how unhappy she looked. "Jen, your not a prisoner you can go out." The pizza delivery arrived he handed her the meal.

"What did you mean, when you said you owe Jim a lot." He laughed sitting beside her.

"Now your worrying about Jim."

"No not really, I just wondered." She stated.

"I've known him since we were kids he probably saved my life. I needed a transplant and lucky for me, he was a good match." He paused. "I can remember how terrified he was but he didn't hesitate. The hospital was like my second home, so it didn't really bother me. I helped him and in turn he helped me, and now we are so close, we are like brothers." He glanced at her has he spoke tears ran down her face.

"Now whats wrong?" He wiped away her tears has he spoke.

"Nothing!" She finished her meal avoiding his attention.

"You are getting upset about something." He turned her head gently.

"I just think its amazing a person can give part of themselves to save a life, and if he hadn't." She paused wiping her face. "I wouldn't be here would I ?" he hugged her gently.

"Well he did, and you have me 100%." She cuddled into him watching the movie, tears ran down her face as the movie finished, she quickly hid her face wiping the tears on his T-shirt.

"you shouldn't hide your feelings Jen." He stroked her hair gently.

"How did you know." She sighed. "I always cry at sad movies." He pointed to the wet patch on his T-shirt.

"Pete I've been thinking about what you said." She trembled as she spoke. "I want you to give me a proper medical, I know you wouldn't lie to me."  He opened his case silently removing his stethoscope, she trembled badly has he held her wrist.

"We don't have to do this, if you don't want too." He reassured her.

"I want to know." She said quietly. He gently examined her back the bruises had begun to fade, a silent tear rolled down his face he wiped it away quickly, gently examing her legs checking her bruised thighs making her gasp.

"I'm sorry lay down." He quickly finished the examination sitting beside her. "Your healing nicely." She pulled him towards her kissing him, "Did I say healing or healed?" He gently made love to her, she sat up startled her pulse raced, he held her close comforting her.

"I saw Sirrius again." She gasped trembling. "Why can't I just forget him." She cried, he laid her down gently fright filled her eyes worrying him. "Just make him go away Pete, please." She begged.

"Just relax, close your eyes." He whispered, she closed her eyes slowly, quickly opening them again checking he hadn't left her, he fell asleep cradling her in his arms. Jenny awoke first walking into the bathroom quickly showering, wrapping his dressing gown around her hurrying to the kitchen. He tossed and turned calling her name as she sat on the edge of the bed, nudging him gently.

"I think you had a nightmare." She wiped the sweat from his face kissing him.

"Did I wake you?" He lit a cigarette as he spoke offering her the packet, he trembled slightly.

"No I woke up ages ago, what did you dream about?" She climbed onto the bed sitting beside him.

"Nothing, I need a shower." He stated walking into the bathroom, she finished her coffee waiting patiently for him to return.

"I thought you said it helps to talk, if you have a problem." She whispered hugging him.

"It does help to talk, if you have a problem." He paused. Turning to face her. "But I don't have a problem, I dreamt about that animal, how do feel today?"

"I'm okay, I don't know what happened last night, one minute I was feeling great." She turned him over kissing him, teasing him. He walked into the lounge, sitting on the coach.

"Whats wrong?" She asked sitting beside him, he glanced at her for a few seconds saying nothing. "Well" she demanded.

"I was thinking about last night, when you started to worry about Sirrius." He paused. "What if I caused it." She looked at him shocked. "If we hadn't." He sighed unable to finish his sentence. She held his hand thinking.

"Why don't we find out." She stated pulling him towards her, he held her gently the thought of hurting her weighed heavy on his mind.

"I can't Jen." He whispered as she kissed him. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You could never hurt me." She said quietly, teasing him. He made love to her holding her close. "I told you, I'm okay." She hugged him laughing. "We could stay like this all day." She laughed at his expression.

"You want to stay naked?" He teased sliding her off the coach onto the white sheepskin rug. "Are you really sure you want to." He teased, she gasped holding him close. The phone disturbed them. "Leave it, they will ring back." Pete insisted.

"We can't it might be Caroline." Jenny stated answering the phone, "It was my mum, she's coming to visit." She sighed sitting beside him. "I suppose, I should get dressed. I wonder why they want to visit." She asked puzzled.

"Because you have been ill, and they care about you." Pete quickly tidied the flat knowing they would arrive soon, the doorbell sounded he opened the door

"Good morning Pete. I hope we didn't disturb you." Bill said sitting down glancing around for Jenny.

"I was just tidying up, we've been up for hours." She hurried to the kitchen making them a drink curious about their visit.

"Do you feel better now Jennifer, you certainly look well." Bill asked.

"I feel great, but I have to see a doctor every day, he looks after me don't you?" She sat next to Pete as she spoke. "Pete goes back to work soon, so we decided to tidy up."

"Pete, could I have a word with you in private." Bill asked quietly. Jenny began to worry turning to face her mother unable to question her. Rose held her arm silently.

"We have had a visitor." Bill paused. "Caroline came to our house last night, she was crying demanding to see Jennifer, I didn't recognize her but she was desperate. I thought she might come here." Bill stated concerned about his daughter.

"She came here yesterday, I'm afraid she is a heroine addict. Jim wanted my help, but I'm afraid she doesn't want help from anyone." Pete stated quietly not wanting to upset Jenny.

"Would you help her if you could?" Bill asked quietly, Pete nodded.

"I wouldn't have a choice would I?, Caroline is killing herself I've told her." He thought back to Jennys words as he spoke. "Jenny begged me to help her, but I couldn't." Bill looked shocked the thought of his daughter wanting to help the person that nearly killed her troubled him.

"We nearly had an argument about Caroline, Jenny accused me of not caring enough." He sighed. "I had to tell her about the day she was assaulted, how much it hurt me watching her fight for her life." They returned to the lounge, Jenny glanced at him quickly wanting to know what they had discussed. They finished their drinks and kissed Jenny goodbye before leaving.

"Caroline visited your parents last night, your father just wanted to warn us, in case she came here."

"Did you tell him?" She asked.

"I told him, and I also told him I'd help her if she wanted it." He pulled her towards him gently. "Now where were we before your parents decided to interrupt us?" She pinned him against the coach kissing him.

" I can't remember." She laughed teasing him, he picked her up carrying her to the bedroom.

"I think, I need to help you remember." He teased her slowly undressing her. "Can you remember yet?" She shook her head thinking, wanting him to hold her close, the phone disturbed them again. "I don't believe this." He sighed walking into the lounge quickly returning, bouncing on the bed. "It was a wrong number, so.." she kissed him refusing to release him. "I'm not getting dressed again, I'm not bothered who comes." She insisted stroking his chest teasing him slowly.

"Your quiet." He turned her head gently. "What are you thinking about?" He paused holding her close. She lay silent. "Jenny talk to me."

"I'm okay, I was just thinking about us, I nearly split us, didn't I?" She said quietly dreading his answer.

"I wouldn't say that, your still confused. I don't think anything could split us. I love you too much." He hugged her gently.

"I can't remember what my life was like before I met you." She paused. "You don't regret going out with me, do you?" She asked turning to face him.

"Of course I do, that's why I asked you to move in with me." He laughed sarcastically. She sat deep in thought.

"Pete you didn't mean it did you?" She said.

"No I didn't I was being sarcastic, your being silly. If I didn't want to be with you." He held her close. "You wouldn't be here would you?" He whispered.

"Can we watch a movie in bed?" She stood by the bedroom door waiting for him, he walked towards her holding the belt securing the dressing gown.

"You want to watch a movie?" He stated shocked, she nodded silently. "Okay you get the movie, I'll lock up." She skipped through the dvds finally selecting one, returning to the bedroom.