You don't know me

disclaimer:  I do not own any of these songs, nor do I have the artist's permission to use them. 

Karen sipped her martini and listened to the music coming from the bar’s jukebox as she pretended not to watch the man sitting across from her.  She hummed softly along with Alison Krauss as Alex took another sip from his light beer.  Karen smiled as she thought of the time she sang this song for him.  She was drunk, of course; she wasn’t the type of person to do that sort of thing sober.  She had meant it though, every word...almost.  She and Alex had been friends for so long that they could complete each other’s sentences, people often mistook them for a couple.  Karen only wished that they had the level of connection that Krauss was singing about.

“Hey,” Alex half yelled as he leaned in closer.  “What do you think of the one sitting at the bar?  The blonde.”

Karen looked, pretended to be interested in the blonde’s good looks and perfect ass.  “He’s cute, but isn’t he a little too young for you?”

“If he’s old enough to drink, then he’s old enough.”  Alex threw her a wicked grin.  “The question you should be asking is: is he gay?”

Karen turned back to the blonde.  His shirt and jeans looked as though they had been painted over his perfect body.  When he smoothed his hands through his highlighted hair, Karen noticed that his nails were manicured.  She rolled her eyes as he tipped his head to the side as the bartender bent over to pick up a fallen pitcher.

“Yup,” Karen said, turning her attention back to Alex.  “Gay as Carson.”

Alex raised his eyebrows and continued checking out the gay blonde as the song changed and Karen almost groaned.  Another song that stated how she felt tonight: Take me home tonight, by Eddie Money.  God, she could remember dancing to this song at the first high school dance she and Alex went to, did that make her old?  She finished her martini and motioned for another as she prayed that it wasn’t the case; she was only 33.

“Do you think I should order him a drink?”

Karen snapped back to reality.  “Huh?”

“Do you think I should buy the cute blonde at the bar a drink?”

“I didn’t know you were looking to pick anyone up tonight, I thought you were just looking,” Karen shouted over Eddie Money’s female backup singer.

Yes, Karen thought to herself, you should take me home tonight, not some blonde tart.  Who cares that I don’t have a penis, you were attracted once.

Karen and Alex had dated throughout high school and through his first semester of college, when she was still a senior.  She still remembered getting that fateful call, the one where Alex told her he had gone to a party, had too much to drink, and ended up sleeping with his roommate, an event that he actually enjoyed.  Karen had decided that although it hurt, it wasn’t Alex’s fault he was gay, and she could still be his friend, even though she wanted more.  It was a stamp of her naivety that she thought simple friendship would work.

“Sending him a drink isn’t picking him up, it’s letting him know I’m friendly and interested.  What do you think he’s drinking?”

Karen looked over at the young man’s glass.  “Cosmo,” she said, noting the pink substance in his martini glass as the waitress brought her second round.

“Excuse me, miss?  Could you bring that man at the bar another Cosmo, please?  Thanks.”

Karen looked at Alex in shock.  He had actually just ordered a man, who’s drinking eligibility was questionable, a drink.  Their waitress placed the drink in front of him and pointed to Alex.  The boy–he was still a boy, really–turned and waved flirtatiously at Alex, who waved back, equally as flirtatious.

“See,” he said, so softly that she had to lean in to hear him over the din, “told you I wasn’t picking anyone up.”

The jukebox, which was playing her heart tonight, seemed to think otherwise, as Jann Arden poured from its speakers, bringing Karen almost to tears.  If there was ever a song that described her feelings about Alex, this was it.  Karen drained her glass, motioning for another as Jann crooned on.

“Oh, I am just a friend, that’s all I’ve ever been, ‘cause you don’t know me.”

Karen tried to hide her tears as she turned away from Alex, pretending to look at something interesting off in the corner.  She was drunk, that was the only time she ever cried in public.  She told herself to buck up, that she was being ridiculous, as she turned back to find Alex standing up.

“Where are you going?”

“I, um, just thought I’d go over and introduce myself.  You know, maybe invite him to join us?  Is that okay?”

He didn’t wait for her answer, but was briskly walking across the bar.  Karen watched in shock as the two men whispered back and forth, the blonde pointing at the door, Alex nodding in agreement.  As they walked past together, Alex gave her the thumbs-up, mouthed “See you,” and was gone with the beautiful blonde boy.

“You give your hand to me and then you say good-bye.  I watch you walk away besides the lucky guy.  Oh, you will never know the one who loves you so, ‘cause you don’t know me...”

There was nothing for Karen to do but drain her last martini and find a cab as Jann continued singing, unaware of how true her words were.