Man vs. Woman: Sofa Shopping

From the dawn of mankind, males and females have attempted to coexist in one living space. Though it may seem romantic and exciting in the beginning, never has your relationship been challenged like your first attempt to shop for furniture together.

Now I like to think I’m a fairly reasonable person, however my mettle was sorely tested when I first moved in with my fiancé. The first few months of living with his personal decorating style (think burlap meets aging leather with a novelty Craps coffee table that he proudly constructed himself) was a tribute to my love-induced patience and the fact that we were still firmly residing in the “Honeymoon” phase. Don’t misunderstand me, I do think that the Craps table is kind of cool and a hit when we hold parties, but I draw the line at a scratchy sofa that leave welts on any part of my skin with which it comes in contact. We’ll leave his favorite aging leather chair, with the stuffing knocked out of it, for another discussion.

After a tortuous three weeks of me subsisting in a veritable stupor from antihistamine medication, we decided the scratchy wool sofa had to go. So my fiancé and I set out on our first furniture shopping jaunt as a couple. Oh the fantasies I had! The two of us holding hands as we gazed at sofa sets we both absolutely adored, happily bouncing up and down on the cushions to test the comfort factor, and then cozily sipping cups of coffee while we discussed our numerous options of elegant, comfy, reasonably priced sofas. Reality check: he doesn’t drink coffee, and furniture shopping sucks. From the oily salespeople with naked desperation in the eyes, to the cramped showrooms, to the fact that you actually have to take into account another person’s personal tastes and dislikes, this event is not for the faint of heart. Overall, I thought I was somewhat prepared for these potential pitfalls, but I was not prepared for a difference in our actual shopping styles. I have always been somewhat of an impulse buyer. I see it. I like it. I have to have it. Once I own something, I do not keep looking for the item, nor do I comparison shop after the fact. Please bear in mind that this method of shopping is only for some items. It in no way relates to how I shop for some select items, like clothing.

As days dragged into weeks and weeks dragged into months, my desperation grew. By now, I was resorting to draping the sofa with sheets or towels before I sat on it. Effective? Somewhat. Kicky designer style? Hardly. As time passed, we settled on the color, and general style. But while I was ready to buy the damn thing already, he was in his element with comparison shopping and haggling with salespeople over a multitude of virtually identical pieces. Finally that glorious day arrived when we settled on a sofa set. Words cannot express my exhilaration, my relief, my rapidly fraying sanity. We had found the Holy Grail after a long, arduous journey – a new sofa we both like that didn’t exacerbate my sensitive skin. And it was reasonably priced! I knew I would never forget the contentment infusing my being as I supervised the delivery men’s placement of my perfect new sofa. Until my fiancé uttered those fateful words, “I think we need a new T.V.” As I ran screaming from the room, I reflected on his shopping style and its correlation to our relationship. While I was satisfied with buying the first sofa we saw, he was someone who needed to gather all the facts and question endlessly, to debate (at length) the merits of similar items. This resulted in an informed decision regarding something he was going to have to live with for a long time. And you know what? That’s fine with me. I am engaged to a man with high standards for all aspects of his life. As his future wife, I take that as a compliment.