Sex in a Long Term Relationship

Sex in a Long Term Relationship

At the beginning of any relationship, sex with your new man is generally the highlight of your day – and morning, evening and night! Exploring your partner’s body, finding out what turns him on and really excites him can be just as much fun as allowing him to return the favour. When it comes to sex, we can’t get enough of it. We can’t do it in enough places. We can’t tell enough of our friends. We always want more and men being the creatures they are, we tend to get it.

All this manages to happen regardless of the physical differences that exist between men and women. It takes very little to excite a man. The mere mention of a female name can be enough - fine for his new woman. It doesn’t take much to get us going either.

However, all good things must come to an end, and this includes the sexually stimulating honeymoon period. It does not mean an end to sex. Nor does it mean that we no longer find our partner attractive. It simply signifies that we, as women, have reached a new milestone in the relationship. This milestone is an important one to us. It is the point where we feel a new level of comfort with our man. We no longer need to impress him in the bedroom. Hugs and cuddles are sufficient and the simply being held makes us feel safe, secure, very much loved and in love.

Men however do not seem to go through this transition. As a result, there eventually comes a time where our men still want as much physical love as possible while women are no longer so easily aroused. Our feelings toward our partner may be even deeper than before but sex has become a less important aspect of the relationship. We still value it, we still enjoy it, we simply realise that there is more to consider.

This can be a difficult time for men. They may begin to question their ability to please us. They wonder if you are getting your sexual gratification elsewhere. We mustn’t forget either that it can be hard physically too. Men need release and they can get extremely frustrated if they don’t get it! The situation can cause arguments and bring a sense of tension to the relationship. All in all, it can be a complicated time for both parties.

However, it doesn’t have to be this way. By continuing to communicate, by making sure your man knows how you feel and vice versa, you can both continue to enjoy sex and, above all, each other.

Honesty is always the best policy. Explain to your partner how the female mind and body work. He needs to know what you are feeling in order to understand and appreciate it. You need to make sure that he is aware your love for him is actually growing and that you feel less of a need to be physical. Let him know you still desire him, you still find him attractive and you still enjoy sex. Also make sure he knows that this sex is with him and no one else.

Men can be difficult creatures to read so make sure you listen carefully to what he says during your conversation. Give him the time and space he needs to talk. Answer his questions truthfully, remembering you need to be honest with yourself as well as your partner.

There is one point to consider which is more important than any other. Do not have sex if you don’t want it. Doing this may please your man temporarily but it is doubtful you will enjoy it. This can lead to resentment towards your partner and a turning away from sex completely. If this happens, it will be much more difficult to work things out than if you had talked earlier in the relationship.

If you and your man are right together, you will be able to communicate your feelings, understand and respect each other and your individual needs. You are a partnership but you are also your own people. Enjoy yourselves as well as each other.

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