A friend's pain

Carrie,
Word has only just reached me of what's happened within your family of late. I cannot bear the indignity of what your father did to you any more than you can, nor can I heal the pain caused by it. I can only offer my sincerest condolences, as empty as they may seem, in the hopes that you might one day forgive my actions in having neglected you in your time of need. I cannot begin to tell you how my soul is torn within me at the news of his death and your part in it. Had I been there, perhaps things would have been different somehow; perhaps I could have done something, anything, to change it. I have often wondered why God has placed me in situations in which I may aid people for a short time only to hear of a tragedy that I could have taken part in averting had I been there just a little while longer. It seems there is no justice for the suffering, and very little peace for me. I take no solace anymore in the presence of my God; He seems very far from me. Few have understood this, best of all you and Jennifer, and perhaps your suffering mother as well. I can only tell you that there can be found some measure of peace in Him if only you would turn to Him. As for myself, I am content in my suffering, knowing that it may one day be alleviated and, if not, His glory is still made known in me because of it. You must take heart. Do not allow circumstance to dictate who you are. You are who you are in God, and in Him you are complete. I wish that there were some words I could give you beyond what I have thus written in order that the burden of your heart might be lifted, but words fail me, as they so often do. I can only ask of you what I can expect of myself, and that seems to be so very little. There is so little I can do, so little that I am, so little I can be. I am not the man you think I am, regardless of what you may believe I have done for you in the past. I could not save you then, nor was I able to save you this time; I can do nothing. If anything, allow my weakness to showcase the strength of our Heavenly Father, in whose arms you may so blissfully rest.
I have said all that I can. Send my regards to those of the faith and may God's light shine on you in this darkest hour. His peace be with you.

-Brenden