I'll Never Forget

The sunlight coming in my window, shining on my face, wakes me. I sit up, looking at the picture of you sitting on my nightstand. Then it all hits me.
The events from the night before come crashing back into my brain. The call from your parents telling me that you’d been in an accident. Myself, rushing down to the hospital to see you. Sitting in the waiting room waiting for news. The awkward silence hanging over everyone.
Finally the doctor comes out with news of your condition. We were all shocked by what we hear. The doctor said you wouldn’t make it, the only thing keeping you alive was the life support. Your mother and I both burst into tears. Your father tried to stay strong, but I could see the tears in his eyes through my own.
Your parents make the decision to take you off the life support. It’s hard for me to accept, but I can’t imagine how your parents must feel. I just want you to hold me in your arms and tell me everything will be okay. But you won’t be able to do that now or ever again.
It’s time to say our good-byes. I go first and the sight of you lying in the bed hooked up to a bunch of machines is almost too much. My hand meets my mouth in an unsuccessful attempt to muffle the sob that escaped from somewhere deep inside of me.
There is any empty chair sitting by your bed, waiting for me. I walk over and sit down on the edge of the chair, leaning close to you, trying to get as close as I can. I take your hand in mind and look at your sweet face. More tears come to my eyes.
“Sweetie I love you so much. I don’t blame you for this. I’ll never blame you. It’s not your fault. I’ll never forget you. It’s not fair. I love you so much and it’s not fair that you’re going to be taken from me. I love you so much and I’ll never forget you.” I said softly trying to look at you through my tears.
I buried my head in the sheets that were covering your body. I cried until your father came into the room. He walked over to us and wrapped me up into a hug. He held me until my crying slowed. Then he helped me up and started to lead me out of the room.
But I couldn’t leave until I said good-bye. I broke from his embrace and made my way back to your bed.
I leaned over you and whispered softly, so only you could hear.
“Good-bye sweetie. I love you so much. I promise I’ll never forget.” I whispered softly.
I leaned in and kissed you softly on the lips, for what I knew was the last time. I kept expecting you to wake up and take me in your arms. But you didn’t. You continued to lay there, without any sign of life.
“Good-bye.” I whispered.
I turned and walked to the door, joining your father. I looked back at you one more time, etching ever detail of your face into my memory.
Your father escorted me back to the waiting room, where my mother had arrived. I fell into her arms and cried while your parents went to say their good-byes.
When the came back, I looked up to see your mother standing only a couple of steps away from me. She looked directly at me and nodded. I knew it was all over.
“He’s gone.” Your father said slowly, barely audible.
I stood up and your mother wrapped me into a hug. It was the first time she hugged me, but it was the most meaningful.
I left soon after that. I was too upset to drive myself so I left my car at the hospital and rode with my mother. She wanted to talk, but I just wasn’t in the mood. I just needed to be alone.
When we got home, I went straight to my room, ignoring questions from my father. I reached to my bedside table to grab the remote to my CD player. In the process, I hit the picture of you, knocking it to the floor. I turned my CD player on, only to hear the CD you’d given me for my birthday, only a month before.
I leaned over and picked up the picture of you. It was the one I’d taken last summer when we’d taken a day trip to the beach. You were sitting in the sand beside where you’d written our names in the sad.
The picture brought fresh tears to my eyes, when I’d thought I didn’t have any tears left. I ran my finger across the picture of you, tracing the outline of your face.
Tears flowed freely, cascading their way down my cheeks. I reached up to wipe them away, but stopped. I turned off the light and lay in my bed crying. I cried myself to sleep, to meet dreams filled with you.