Action/Adventure
This week: Edited by: W.D.Wilcox More Newsletters By This Editor
1. About this Newsletter 2. A Word from our Sponsor 3. Letter from the Editor 4. Editor's Picks 5. A Word from Writing.Com 6. Ask & Answer 7. Removal instructions
"Hi-yi! You're up a stump, ain't you! Say--I'm going in a-swimming, I am. Don't you wish you could? But of course you'd druther work--wouldn't you?"
"What do you call work?"
"Why, ain't that work?"
"Well, maybe it is, and maybe it ain't. All I know is, it suits Tom Sawyer."
"Oh come, now, you don't mean to let on that you like it?"
"Like it? Well, I don't see why I oughtn't to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence everyday?"
-'The Adventures of Tom Sawyer' by Mark Twain
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Dialogue: The Written Word Is Speaking
I love to write dialogue(dialog). I like it so much I even spell it with a couple of extra letters LOL. Some of you may have seen my weekly contest, "The Dialogue 500" ? It’s loads of fun, and good practice too. For example, last week the prompt was to write a conversation between two people from different parts of the world with two completely different accents. Writing a character with an accent helps define who that person is. It gives your story character, but ya gotta ‘member…don’t go overboard.
Most experts say NOT to write your dialogue with an accent because it is distracting to the reader. They suggest using cadence in your consonants—and rhythmic flow.
Yeah…whatever.
Tell that to Mark Twain!
Or how about a pirate without an accent, huh? It just wouldn’t sound the same. “Uh, excuse me kind sir…where’s the treasure?” Instead of, “Arrrgh…whar be the treasure, matey?”
I always seem to add at least one character in my stories that has a southern drawl of some kind. I guess it’s because I talk that way myself so it makes it easier to write . And how about writing a character with a Spanish accent? (Ah, that reminds me…you can press the ALT key + 164 (on the number pad) and it should generate this…Ñ. In fact, here’s a list of codes you can use to type accents.)
Here are ALT key codes for typing accents in a few languages. The three-digit key combinations for the accents precede each accent. You get the same character also by typing the four-digit codes in parentheses after the letters in the chart. If there is no three-digit code for a character, you will have to use the four-digit sequence for that character.
FRENCH
133 à (0224) 137 ë (0235) 151 ù (0249) 144 É (0201) 235 Ù (0217)
131 â (0226) 216 Ï (0207) 150 û (0251) 210 Ê (0202) 234 Û (0219)
135 ç (0231) 140 î (0238) 183 À (0192) 211 Ë (0203) 174 « (0171)
130 é (0233) 139 ï (0239) 182 Â (0194) 215 Î (0206) 175 » (0187)
138 è (0232) œ (0156) 128 Ç (0199) 226 Ô (0212)
136 ê (0234) 147 ô (0244) 212 È (0200) Œ (0140)
SPANISH
160 á (0224) 162 ó (0243) 144 É (0201) 233 Ú (0218)
130 é (0233) 163 ú (0250) 214 Í (0205) 154 Ü (0220)
161 í (0237) 129 ü (0252) 165 Ñ (0209) 168 ¿ (0191)
164 ñ (0241) 181 Á (0193) 224 Ó (0211) 173 ¡ (0161)
PORTUGUESE
198 ã (0227) 199 Ã (0195) 135 ç (0231) 128 Ç (0199)
ITALIAN
133 à (0224) 141 ì (0236) 151 ù (0249) 212 È (0200) 227 Ò (0210)
138 è (0232) 149 ò (0242) 183 À (0192) 222 Ì (0204) 235 Ù (0217)
GERMAN/SCANDINAVIAN
132 ä (0228) 137 ë (0235) 231 þ (0254) 143 Å (0197) 153 Ö (0214)
134 å (0229) 148 ö (0246) 129 ü (0252) 146 Æ (0198) 157 Ø (0216)
145 æ (0230) 155 ø (0248) 152 ÿ (0255) 209 Ð (0208) 232 Þ (0222)
208 ð (0240) 225 ß (0223) 142 Ä (0196) 211 Ë (0203) 154 Ü (0220)
What About Attribution Or Mannerism?
That's a good question. Let’s look at the dialogue of two people having an argument.
“You can’t tell me that,” Peter growled, “without backing it up.”
“Oh yeah?” Fred pulled himself up to his full height, wielding his fist. “I can back it up with this!”
Just look at the shapes of the dialogue itself. The first speaker could have just as easily said either of these things:
Peter growled, “You can’t tell me that without backing it up.”
“You can’t tell me that without backing it up,” Peter growled.
I chose to interrupt Peter’s speech with attribution and a mannerism because it makes the speech seem as if it didn’t all come out in a rush. In the example with the attribution first, the fact that he growled seems more important than the words he said. In the example with the attribution afterward, the attribution is unimportant—even distracting—if you realize that readers probably already knew that Peter and Fred were having a heated conversation.
Fred’s activities are described in the same style as Peter’s for the same reason. In the rest of the dialogue, I have to be careful that every single speech doesn’t come out this way or it will seem trite in short order.
Describing Fred’s behavior eliminated the need for a “said” or something like growled or shouted, either of which would grow tiresome if the argument doesn’t get any more explicit sometime soon. Let’s look at Fred’s speech turned around:
Fred pulled himself up to his full height, wielding his fist. “Oh yeah? I can back it up with this!”
“Oh yeah? I can back it up with this!” Fred pulled himself up to his full height, wielding his fist.
In the first example, Fred wields his fist before we know how he will respond to Peter’s speech. That’s okay, but I think it takes a little of the drama out of the situation. If we imagine that Fred is much smaller than Peter, it also adds a touch of the ridiculous.
The same thing happens when we push the attributive action to the end: the drama is sucked out of it. But now that it’s set up, fists and words can fly for a while without any attribution at all. The irrationality of a physical fight can be illustrated by leaving the reader wondering who said what.
Let’s try another. How about a little young love?
“Dana,” Arnold said, blushing. “Would you go to the dance with me on Friday?”
Dana was shattered. She had hoped that Mark would ask her first. “Can I tell you later? I’m not sure my mother will let me go.”
“Um, sure. Take your time.” He watched Dana walk away before he fled into the chemistry classroom.
In the first sentence, I interrupted Arnold with attribution because I wanted Arnold to have said Dana’s name as a complete sentence. He’s trying to get her attention.
In the second sentence, I wanted Dana to pause before speaking for a reason. We have to learn the reason or her non-refusal is just mean. And now we know that she is lying but it is not clear whether her motivations are to protect Arnold or herself.
In the third sentence, where Arnold has to deal with his humiliation, I originally cited his actions as an attribution with an action (he said, and fled into the classroom), but I decided that it was stronger if I used narrative to make a pause while he processed information. I wanted Arnold to be shy but not stupid.
The trick is to impart more information than the simple exchange of words. How characters say things is important, as is where and to whom. You probably heard that in High School.
Until next time,
billwilcox
And don’t forget to checkout my little contest
And another great contest using only dialogue…
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The EDITOR PICKS (his nose)
Here are some stories written ONLY in dialogue. Read-Rate-Review!
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ADVENTURESOME FEEDBACK
Dottie
Submitted Comment:
I'm just saying "hi" and a thank you for your contribution in the way of input into the Newsletters. They are so easy to follow. It would be nice if I were 30 to 40 years younger and a member of Writing.Com. I would achieve so much from your helpful tips. But then, of course, The Story Master and Story Mistress wouldn't have been born, and a writing site such as this one would not be in existence. Forty years ago, I never dreamed I would be using a computer let only writing as I'm doing on Writing.Com.
Thanks and best regards.
Warmly,
Dottie
Dear Warmly Dottie,
Thank you for your kind words. But remember, you are never too old to learn a new trick. I’m living proof of that…well, ancient living proof maybe, or better yet, fossilized living proof. Yeah, that’s it.
kittiara
Submitted Comment:
Awww . A belated response but thank you W.D. for featuring my work and above all, for your kind words *hugs*. You are so sweet! And an amazingly talented author, whom I greatly admire.
Kitti, Kitti, Kitti, I meant every word, but you’re right, I am sweet. Why, just the other day my beautiful wife was saying, “Hey, knock it off, Candy Hound! You're eating all the sweets in the house!”
scribbler
Submitted Comment:
If I had five thumbs, they would all be way WAY up! I really enjoyed this week’s newsletter and I found it very helpful. Thanks :]
Thanks so much. I never get tired of hearing that. And if you had five thumbs you’d be in a freak show
Puditat
Submitted Comment:
What an excellent editorial, Bill. Your every word is true and a basic 'need-to-know" for every writer. Thank you for the features too, and the very sweet plug. I see I have to go update my bio though , it's a tad out-of-date. Sadly, Pudi passed away, but we now have two cute kittens - Smooch and Simba.
Thank you again, Bill.
I meant every word, Pudi . It’s great to be surrounded by cats like you and kittiara.
alissaameth
Submitted Comment:
Hey there!Thanks for the brilliant suggestion about reading aloud regularly. I mean, I'm used to talking to myself, but it had never occurred to me that I could use that to find my own voice!
Alissa,You can read aloud, or you can read out loud…the point is to be really LOUD! I wanna hear ya all the way over here, okay?
concrete_angel
Submitted Comment:
Hi, W.D! This was yet another cool newsletter. I definitely had fun reading your thoughts, and they are ones that I will remember as I write. It's great to just let the words come out! I have no idea what my style is, but I know it when I see it, lol. I guess that the best thing about writing, no matter what the style, just feel comfortable with it.
Thank you, angel, and I’m glad to be of some help. Although some would say to do the exact opposite of whatever I say .
Vivian
Submitted Comment:
Bill, I agree with almost all your points, and you give some good advice. I also agree that adverbs and adjectives should be used only if needed, but stating first, as you did, that they should not be used gives the wrong idea. I just wrote an article on using specific and vivid modifiers and to avoid vague and abstract ones. People who state in their reviews, "Don't use adverbs" or "Don't use adjectives" or "Don't use prepositions" are wrong. It doesn't help when they scim an editorial and read that adverbs and adjectives shouldn't be used. I said scim because, if they read the whole point, they will see that modifiers shouldn't be over-used. A good newsletter as usual.
-Viv
School teachers…ya gotta love ‘em . Thanks, Viv…
schipperke
Submitted Comment:
I found my voice in the shower this morning...
I’m sure you did, Schippster…I’m sure you did.
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