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Printed from https://writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/8765-Drama-in-the-Description.html
Drama: February 21, 2018 Issue [#8765]

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Drama


 This week: Drama in the Description
  Edited by: THANKFUL SONALI Library Class! Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

At a book-reading recently, the author said she was going to read out a 'description'. As I listened to her read, I thought, "My goodness, this is doing so much more!" and it brought home, afresh, how much a description can achieve.


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Letter from the editor

Dear Reader,

In an earlier issue of the Drama Newsletter, "Writing Solid Descriptions That DeliverOpen in new Window., Joy Author Icon gave us some deep insights into what a good description does. Here, I try to add to what she said, with some examples that I found intriguing.

Listening to Sadiqa Peerbhoy read from her book, "House of Discord" recently, I was struck by the description she read out, and decided to analyse it. The book is set in the post-Babri Masjid Bombay of 1992, when the city was, as the blurb of the book says, 'wallowing in hate'. From evoking a culture to detailing a situation; from giving a hint of everyday life to capturing an uncertain political scenario; from making the reader feel they’re there, to foreshadowing what’s going to happen, the description does it all.

Extract from HOUSE OF DISCORD by Sadiqa Peerbhoy

There was a bright blue sky that morning, that belied the state of siege that had stunned the city for days. The sizzle and pop of frying mustard seeds sent up a teasing smell. The strong fragrance of asafoetida flew out and up from the kitchen. Outside, there was the banging that said the garbage collectors were back on the job, emptying bins now overflowing. Sounds and smells of ordinariness. They were good news.

After eight days of curfew, when even the crows seem to have deserted the city, Bombay was juggling back to normal. The buses were running, trains were clanking on their rails and the commuters, in their numbers, were streaming in from the suburbs – hanging precariously by their toe and a prayer outside crammed third-class compartments.

The famous dabba-wallahs, who, rain or shine, carried thousands of lunch boxes to their destination from homes miles away, were back with their long carriers swaying on their heads as they shouted for passers-by to get out of the way. The spirit of Bombay was collecting its wounded self together and brushing off scabs to get back as close to normalcy as was possible. But suspicion and wariness remained ...


*********


You learn what people cook with. You learn how lunch is delivered, and how people go to work each day. You also learn that there had been something amiss, and it is remedying now -- through the everyday action of the garbage collectors and birds. And, in the last line, you learn that things are not quite normal yet.

In the following extract from "Animal Farm", George Orwell describes mostly actions -- how the animals gathered. Gives the characteristics of each animal, and a sense of anticipation.

Extract from ANIMAL FARM by George Orwell

As soon as the light in the bedroom went out, there was a stirring and a fluttering all through the farm buildings. Word had gone round that old Major, the prize middle white boar, wished to communicate with the other animals. It had been agreed that they should all meet in the big barn as soon as Mr. Jones was safely out of the way. Old Major (so he was always called, though the name under which he had been exhibited was Willingdon Beauty) was so highly regarded on the farm that everyone was quite ready to lose an hour’s sleep in order to hear what he had to say.

The animals arrived in the barn and began to make themselves comfortable after their different fashions. The dogs and pigs settled down in the straw, the hens perched themselves on the window-sills, the pigeons fluttered up to the rafters, the sheep and cows lay down and began to chew the cud. Clover the mare set her hooves down with great care lest there should be some small animal concealed in the straw. A brood of ducklings which had just lost their mother filed into the barn, cheeping feebly and wandering from side to side to find some place where they would not be trodden on. Clover made a wall round them with her great foreleg, and the ducklings nestled down inside it and promptly fell asleep.

When Major saw that all the animals had made themselves comfortable, he cleared his throat and began:
“Comrades, I do not think that I shall be with you for many months longer, and before I die I feel it is my duty to pass on to you such wisdom as I have acquired ...”


*********


You understand not only how each animal moved, but the compassion that some had for others, and you feel a sense of unity among them already.

In his short story, "A Face in the Dark", Ruskin Bond captures the atmosphere, the character of the man -- directly and through his possession (flashlight/torch), and again, hints at the story to unfold.

Extract from A FACE IN THE DARK by Ruskin Bond

When there was a strong wind, the pine trees made sad, eerie sounds that kept most people to the main road. But Mr. Oliver was not a nervous or imaginative man. He carried a torch and its gleam – the batteries were running down – moved fitfully down the narrow forest path. When its flickering light fell on the figure of a boy, who was sitting alone on a rock, Mr. Oliver stopped. Boys were not supposed to be out after dark.

“What are you doing out here, boy?” asked Mr. Oliver, sharply, moving closer so that he could recognize the miscreant. But even as he approached the boy, Mr. Oliver sensed that something was wrong. The boy appeared to be crying.


*********


You see how Mr. Oliver is different from other people, and perhaps a bit lax about his possessions, and how he doesn't simply walk past a mystery, he tries to figure out what's going on.

I leave you with Milan Kundera's description of two contrasting groups of people. Enjoy!

Extract from: THE BOOK OF LAUGHTER AND FORGETTING by Milan Kundera.

A magazine photograph: a row of men in uniform, bearing rifles and in helmets with protective plastic visors, watch a group of young people in jeans and T-shirts, hand in hand in a ring, dance in front of them. The young people have formed a circle, and, to a simple will-known tune, are taking two steps in place, one step forward, raising first the left leg and then the right.

I think I understand them: they have the impression that that circle they are describing on the ground is a magical circle uniting them like a ring. And their chests swell with an intense feeling of innocence: they are united not by marching, like soldiers, but by dancing, like children. What they are trying to spit in the cops’ faces is their innocence.

That is how the photographer saw them, and he brought out the eloquent contrast: on the one side, the police in the false unite (imposed, commanded) of the row, on the other, the young people in the true unity (sincere and natural) of the circle; on this side, the police in the sullen posture of lying in wait, and on that one, those who are delighting in play.


A lot -- in a few sentences, a few paragraphs, by diverse authors.

Hope it gave you something to think about!
Dragon Sig created by Kiya gifted by Secret Squirrel! Thank you!



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I love that you give examples and don't just TELL us what to do. I see in each one that changing the POV can change the story, even if the characters are the same. This has given me a great idea for a plot I'm working on. I have the woman as the protagonist. Humm Its usually the man in an action story. This time its all about the woman. Thanks for the idea.

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Excellent, excellent newsletter!!! (insert applause here)

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