  Romance/Love
This week: Writing Love Realistically for Teens Edited by: Crys-not really here  
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Hello! My name is Crys-not really here and I am the proud editor of the Romance/Love Newsletter this week! |
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Writing Love Realistically for Teens
I work with seventh graders. They're interesting little people. Half of them are shy, insecure, and awkward. The other half of them are loud, overly confident, and awkward. If you're anything like me, you've forgotten what it was like to be in middle school, or even high school. Try hanging out with a bunch of twelve-year-olds for a few days and I'm sure your memories will come flooding back!
Middle school is that awkward stage in development where girls are clearly starting to mature faster than boys. The girls want to start dating guys, but the guys generally think girls have cooties. As a result, we start to see girls having crushes on celebrities (One Direction, anyone?) and older boys. When a girl and a boy "like like" each other, they sometimes express it by poking, teasing and playfully pushing each other. It's obvious to me, as an adult, what is going on, even if its not always obvious to both parties involved.
As regular readers of my newsletters may know, I am all about writing romance that's realistic. When it comes to writing for preteens and teens, an author usually can't escape a romantic storyline of some sort. But how are adults supposed to remember what it was like to be "in love" when they were thirteen, especially if they blocked out all the bad stuff?
Many writers rely on their own children for inspiration, but using your teen's love life as inspiration for a storyline can be kind of awkward for your child. In my opinion, teachers are in the best position to absorb all aspects of teen culture, how they interact, and how they express themselves to others. All of that stuff is usable in your fiction, even if you can't use exact names, dates and storylines. Learning the language of love for teens is a lot like learning any language, like French or Spanish. If you immerse yourself with fluent speakers, you'll be picking up the lingo, jargon and mannerisms in no time!
What if you're not a teacher? Try to volunteer with kids the age you want to write about. At the very least, hang out where they hang out and watch them (not too creepily!). You may be able to camp out a local library or coffee shop and get some writing done while you're at it.
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Thank you to everyone who has recently written into my newsletters! I enjoy reading your feedback!
Hi Crys. I enjoyed reading this newsletter and I totally agree; there should always be a place for realistic moments, especially if the realistic experiences happen to be awkward. This is because this awkwardness can arouse conflicts, negative feelings, distorted self-images, negative thoughts , etc which, I think, make the stories better especially if the character has to overcome the above negative things. Thank you and hope to read another of your interesting newsletters again. -pinkbarbie
you're so right; not every 'first' is perfect. As a writer of lesbian romance genre, I continue to learn how to bring reality into each relatioship including conversation about 'I need to change" if I want to keep a lover/partner/sweetheart.. and, sometimes, the first kiss that seemed awkward to both lovers. Thanks for reminding us. -ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy 
You are so right about how first are usually messy rather than magical. Similarly, I find the infatuation with virgins in some books to be incomprehensible. It reduces these "heroines" to one-time-use characters. I rather read a bit more messy romances that feature partners who are in the know. -Annette 
I like imperfect characters, moments that go wrong and struggles to reach happily ever after. They make a story more interesting and more believeable. However, a 'happily ever after' ending is NOT NEGOTIABLE as far as I'm concerned. Thankfully the industry seems to agree with me, so I can read my many many romance novels and rest assured that each one will finish with a happy ending for the H and h. Perhaps not in the way I expected, but with a happy ever after nonetheless. -Elle - on hiatus
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Romance/Love: January 15, 2013 Issue [#5460]
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