Noticing Newbies
This week: Five, Four, Three, Two, One Edited by: Brooke More Newsletters By This Editor
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JACE ~ Brooke ~ Stephanie Grace ~ Sara♥Jean
"Thank your readers and the critics who praise you, and then ignore them. Write for the most intelligent, wittiest, wisest audience in the universe: Write to please yourself." - Harlan Ellison
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Hello there! This week I thought I'd share five tips to improve your writing.
Never use a "dead" metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing.
"Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use." - Charles M. Schulz
The word metaphor comes from the Greek word metapherin (meaning "transfer"). According to Aristotle, the ability to create memorable metaphors is "a sign of genius, since a good metaphor implies an intuitive perception of the similarity in dissimilars." We use metaphors and similies everyday but sometimes it's hard to remember how to tell them apart. The basic difference is a metaphor is when you say something IS something, where a simile is where you say something is LIKE something else. A good way to remember is simile sounds like similar.
Some of the most memorable authors are known for their creative metaphors. Use them sparingly when the imagery calls for it. If a phrase has been used so often that most people do not imagine the physical action in their mind. This metaphor has died; therefore, it is a "dead metaphor". Make sure the visual you're trying to create is worth the effort.
"The very mystery of him excited her curiosity like a door that had neither lock nor key." - Gone with the Wind, by Margaret Mitchell
Never use a long word where a short one will do.
"It is perfectly okay to write garbage--as long as you edit brilliantly." - C. J. Cherryh
There is a common misconception among new writers and poets that you must use multisyllabic, complex words and phrases to sound intelligent. If your sentences go on for days, trust me, you don't look or sound intelligent. I'm not saying you have to write sentences so clear that third graders could understand them; I'm simply saying - speak normally. Long-winded wordiness will leave your reader drooling on the arm of the chair - engage them with your story and characters, not your exquisite language skills. Do you want your writing tight and efficient, or elaborate and long-winded? It's your literary style, practice it, polish it - own it. Some argue that purposely not using longer or uncommon words just makes readers lazy. Is it really our job to educate our readers? College textbooks not withstanding, last time I checked, reading is supposed to be entertaining
"Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no exceptions to this rule." - Stephen King
If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
"Writing a novel is like driving a car at night. You can only see as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way." - E. L. Doctorow
As they say, "Kill your darlings" ... Was it William Faulkner or Sir Arthur Quiller-Couch who originated that saying? Either way, it's true - a good, harsh edit can turn a good story into a great one. A pleonasm is the use of more words than are necessary to express an idea; redundancy. These are words that can be removed without changing your sentence's meaning. For example, 'Teresa walked to the couch and sat down.' 'Down' is a pleonasm and can be removed without changing the meaning of the sentence." Words such as "that," "very," "both," and "there was" are others. Another mistake is including action with plain dialogue tags - he said, taking a sip of coffee." The action is sufficient to tag your line, you can remove the "he said" completely.
"I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil." - Truman Capote
Don't leave your readers ... Dangling
"Have something to say, and say it as clearly as you can. That is the only secret." - Matthew Arnold
After winning the game, Speedy the dog jumped all over the players.
Umm, who won the game again? Speedy? The problem with the line above is what's called a dangling participle. The participial phrase that begins the sentence doesn't appear to have been intended to modify what follows next in the sentence. However, readers mentally expect it to work that way, so make sure your opening phrase always modifies what immediately follows. If it doesn't, you've left the participle dangling, as well as your readers.
and the ONE thing, the most important of all those listed above?
Write. Keep writing until you finish that blog, that story, that novel, that project. Whatever it is - keep working at it. I know you have it in you, don't let yourself down!
"If you write one story, it may be bad; if you write a hundred, you have the odds in your favor." - Edgar Rice Burroughs
Hope you enjoyed this article. If you would like to share your thoughts, please send me a note using the box at the bottom of this newsletter.
Write and Review on! ~ Brooke
[Related Links]
This month's links are to groups that help you improve your writing.
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I'm featuring some work from authors that sent in feedback to my last newsletter and some that just caught my eye. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.
Excerpt:
The falling in love was replaced by the falling of my mind, my issues too much to bear. I know, my angel, that if you knew about them you would want to ground yourself on my earth and carry me. I could not bear to see you unable to fly, the weight of my concerns being such a heavy burden.
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Excerpt:
Such nonchalance in the face of danger to him and his men was too irresponsible for words. In frustration, he slammed the map onto the table, scattering notes and knocking the precious compass to the ground. She glared at him, but did not move. She was in charge of the mission and was well aware of the risks and the rewards. Lifting her chin, her eyes narrowed as she looked at him, as if to remind him that he was only a hired hand.
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Excerpt:
Being twenty-five years old, I have had a fair amount of friendships as well as relationships. Both type of "-ships" are of equal importance in my heart. But, as odd as it sounds, I hold friends at an arms length, where as a person I'm in relation to, I tend to be more exclusive and intimate with.
I, therefore, proclaim that a friendship is a finite game, and that a relationship is an infinite game.
~ ~
Excerpt:
Seven years of misery had passed. Now rumors were being whispered under the fern. It was said the one who should be king would return in the spring. There were once many who thought Pwyll was the one, but his leaving crushed their hopes. Some were kind and said he had no choice. Others said he was a coward and not fit to rule. A few who were closer to the truth, were saying, he followed his desire and not his duty. Some versions of that theory were more crudely put.
~ ~
Excerpt:
“Go ahead kid, open the bag.”
“What’s in it?” I asked; my ten-year-old curiosity piqued.
“What do you think is in it?” The strange man responded.
“It looks empty”
“To the naked eye, to the unimaginative, to the dreamless, it appears empty.”
The man swept his fingers down his jaw line and pulled his black goatee to a point.
~ ~
Excerpt:
Limbs with graceful, outreached fingers,
silhouetted in white against the dark sky,
cotton balls of ever changing shapes,
moving slowly side by side,
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Excerpt:
I will eat the fruit so good and sweet,
no suffering, no hunger, no reason to weep,
sweetest honey, milk so pure,
a peaceful life and pleasure for sure,
~ ~
Excerpt:
Belief will grow,
Where the sun shines,
Where the rain bows,
And where shadows hide,
In the hearts and souls,
Of every child that grows,
~ ~
Excerpt:
What can we do to restore the hope in this community, in this city, and in this world? The question we’re all asking is ‘what went wrong and where do we go from here?’ But know that you are not alone in this world and the answers may not come right away, but its coming, we just have to keep the faith.
~ ~
Excerpt:
Yes
Earth will turn,
night and day.
Sun will burn,
anyway.
~ ~
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I received some wonderful feedback to my last newsletter [#4893] "Which Word? Common Word Errors" and I'm proud to share it with you.
From Talera
I find in many of the stories I have read on here people confuse words. Some of the ones I have found that haven't been mentioned are 'principal/principle', 'breath/breathe' and 'licence/license'.
From GeorgeR
Brooke, I always enjoy the writing tips that so many of you post. Your article is being added to my writing help folder. Thank you for taking the time to share this information.
From Curtis Lee Cancino
I 'like' this post. :)
From troy ulysses davis
I was thoroughly enjoying today's grammer refresher course when I came across an excerpt from a poem of mine. I was very flattered. I read on and found a typo of mine from a previous feedback submission. Very humbling. Thank you for continuing to be motivation for improvement.
From jim1184
This is a great informative news letter.I make almost all these mistakes. Those mistakes lead to tons of work during revision. One of the first books I plan to put on my new Kindle will be a quick and dirty on grammar.I hope I can get Grammar Girl on my reader.I need portable for the road this summer. Thanks for the tips and the book tips. Jim
From Michael Thomas-Knight
Thanks, I needed those tips, especially the 'lay & 'lie' and the 'which' & 'that' rules. I am always messing those up!
From ~ Aqua ~
thanks a lot! even though i am not a newbie but helped a lot!
From pixie
Great job! Keep it up
From GONE
Affect and effect are definately words that are often misspelled. I'm a thirteen year old, and love English, I knew this fact, and was able to correct my 8th grade English teacher, when she used effect instead of affect! I love that you decided to put this in your article!
From kdelightful
Thank you for the great newsletter they are very helpful!
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