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Printed from https://writing.com/main/newsletters/action/archives/id/3296-The-Ethic-of-Reciprocity.html
Noticing Newbies: October 07, 2009 Issue [#3296]

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Noticing Newbies


 This week: The Ethic of Reciprocity
  Edited by: Shannon Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

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Welcome to the Noticing Newbies Newsletter. I am Shannon Author IconMail Icon and I'm your guest editor this week.


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Letter from the editor

The Ethic of Reciprocity


We all know that newbies aren't the only ones who recieve this newsletter. Many who've been writing.com members for years still subscribe to it, and it's you  I'd like to address in the first few paragraphs. But this newsletter applies to every  WDC member, so newbies ... please keep reading.

For those of you who aren't  newbies, do you remember what it was like? I sure do! Excited yet nervous--eager to share your love of the written word with the world, but unsure whether or not you'd be accepted.

The first review I received in my inbox sent a thrill (and a shiver) up my spine, and my mouse hovered over it for several agonizing seconds before I mustered the courage to actually open it. Oh God, what if they hated it?  I wondered, and deep down I knew this stranger's words might shatter my dreams.

A scary prospect, that. And I remember it like it was yesterday.

"Newbie" doesn't necessarily mean "new"--it may just mean he or she is new to writing.com. The newbie you're reviewing might be a more accomplished writer than you are! He may have published essays, short stories, articles, poems or books under his belt. She might be a famous author writing under a pseudonym ... you never know. But if the newbie you're reading really is new, please keep in mind that you hold their hopes, their confidence, their very dreams in the palm of your hand. One harsh word, one inconsiderate, flippant rebuke can have devastating and long-lasting effects.

I became a WDC member in April of 2006. For the first ten months of my membership, my portfolio was completely empty. I don't think I even signed into my account again until early 2007. I can't remember why, really. Maybe I'd forgotten I'd signed up. Maybe I was intimidated. Whatever the reason, I finally came to my senses and started adding essays, poems, articles and short stories to my port--some of which had already been published. Since February 2, 2007 I've received almost 1000 reviews. 99% of the reviews were helpful, kind, supportive and encouraging. But the other 1%....

Have you noticed how the anonymity of the internet brings out the worst in some people? They hide behind unrecognizable pseudonyms and/or anonymous reviews before whipping out their Howitzers and blowing their competition's aspirations to smithereens.

I'm more of a Golden Rule kinda girl. You know, Do Unto Others  and all that? I'm sure my mother will happily take most of the credit for this (Mom would insist my strict Christian upbringing and private school background had something to do with it), but it's just kind of how I am. It's so ingrained in me that I am actually shocked and appalled (and sometimes even speechless) when someone says or does something rude ... and I'm forty-one years old! *Laugh*

Is that review you're writing something you'd want to see in your own inbox? Are its contents something you'd want said about your own writing? Are your words encouraging, supportive and kind? Do they help?  Or do they hurt?

And there are other ways we harm each other, thus stifling the creative process. Ever heard of Dine & Dash? Well, how about Rate & Run? The Rate & Run is a surreptitious act carried out by members who skulk in (usually anonymously) and slap a one or two-star rating on your item before scampering away posthaste without so much as a single word of encouragement. I can practically hear them cackling with frenzied glee as we speak! *Shock* But seriously, I am inclined to believe ALL ratings should require  a review. After all, how are you helping the writer if you don't provide feedback and suggestions for improvement? Isn't that the whole point of rating and reviewing other people's work?

I'm also not a huge fan of anonymous reviews. You know what I mean ... those six-word cheap shots like "I didn't like this at all" that are usually accompanied by a one or two-star rating. If you really  believe what you're saying and stand behind your words, at least  have the courage to add your name to the review. Anything less is cowardly (in my humble opinion).

And remember that first review I talked about in the third paragraph? Well, the very first review I ever received as a WDC member was for my poem "U.A. Flight 93Open in new Window. [ASR]. Rather than critiquing the piece itself or suggesting ways to improve it, the reviewer took the time to type out a several hundred-word lecture about how I needed to educate myself because 9/11 was an inside job.

*Rolleyes* Kind? Helpful? Supportive? Encouraging? Maybe not so much.

But, as with all things, something positive replaced that negative review. A WDC member and cousin of a woman who perished on United 93 read and reviewed my poem. She had this to say:

Dear Shannon,

Thank you for sharing this piece. It is well done, touching and a true tribute to all, including my cousin Colleen. Thank you and keep writing.

Never allow the ink of your heart to stop flowing!

Sincerely,
Rose


Thank you, Rose. *Cry* That's  the kind of review that makes it all worthwhile.

If everyone  (oldies and newbies alike) practiced the Ethic of Reciprocity (better known as the Golden Rule), we'd make an already wonderful writing community even better. Of course be honest ... but be considerate and thoughtful as well. If we all took just a moment to consider how our words affect others, we could help each other blossom and grow--becoming the best writers we can possibly be.

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P.S. For all you newbies out there--if you need any help whatsoever or just need someone to talk to, please don't hesitate to email me. I will do anything in my power to make your experience here a positive one. Welcome to WDC!


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