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Wow! It’s April, already.  I promise, no April Fool’s pranks will accompany this Newsletter. 
Last month, I had one hectic Saturday morning trying to get last minute things ready to bring to a double-header, birthday party. My brother’s mother-in-law, as well as our mother, share the same birthday. I was asked to make the sugar-free cake for my diabetic mother, and to prepare some appetizers. Appetizers are those things that people pick on while waiting for the real food at a party. It is a good idea that the person bringing them be on time. Sounds pretty simple right? Wait ‘til you see what happens next ... |
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The clock was ticking by, quickly. I needed to be out of the house by 1:30, to make the ninety minute trip to my brother’s house by 3:00 p.m. I had a slight nervous anxiety attack, well, okay, it was a full freak-out panic, scream fest at the two guys in my home. I demanded that the one playing video games cease and desist, while the one on the computer say so-long to whomever awaited an email answer. I asked as sweetly as I could.  Web~Witch can have a little temper, sometimes.  They looked at each other with that, we guys had better stick together nod. The next thing I knew they were on their feet and out the door with food bundles and presents for the party.
As they loaded up the trunk, I quickly got dressed. I peeked out the window and noticed the two male demons, laughing and mocking my little tantrum. In a huff, I took a last minute look in the refrigerator to make sure all the prepared food was packed and out of the house. The kitchen was all clear. The guys did a great job grabbing all of the food.
The dining room was my next check point. I had wrapped the gifts on the dining room table. Ah-Ha! They forgot one of the gifts! Well, that just goes to show you why sometimes a little temper tantrum is necessary. I was smug in my self-righteousness, and fully intended to wipe those silly grins off their faces as soon as I got into the car. 
Thankfully, I changed my mind when I saw them calmly waiting outside the door for me, offering to carry the last few things I decided to bring “just in case.” We would only be around ten minutes late, people won’t starve waiting for me to get there with the cheese ball and other delights.  I finally relaxed and decided to enjoy the ride.
The ride was pleasant. We even laughed at the little snit fit I took earlier. After all, I should have done more preparations the night before or at least have gotten up a little earlier.  It’s not their fault I have the procrastinator gene. I needed the adrenaline rush to get things done.
Twenty minutes into the drive, I turned back toward my son and asked him if he placed the cake in a safe place in the car, so it wouldn’t get bumped around. He looked over his shoulder and said he couldn’t find the cake.
“What do you mean, the cake isn’t there? Of course it’s there, in that round pan with all the aluminum foil surrounding it. Now look again and don’t turn back until you have the cake!”
“I’m sorry Mom, but the cake isn’t here.”
As the car was just getting ready to turn onto the highway, it instead was forced to turn back. We were now heading home to get that stupid, birthday cake. It’s not like I could pick one up on the way. This one is sugar free. It’s my mother’s cake--she would understand, wouldn’t she? The voices echoing in the car told me it just wouldn’t right not to have a cake for Mom.
“Fine, then, let’s go back and get it!” 
Okay, it’s instant replay time. I am bringing the appetizers, I was going to be ten minutes late, now I am nearing an hour late due to the backtracking. There is no way the hungry crowd is going to be pleased. This cannot end well. 
Back at the house, I asked my son to check the dining room. Perhaps I put the cake down when I noticed the gift left behind. He came out and told us it wasn’t there. I ran into the house to check the already checked kitchen and came up empty handed. I went back to the car, totally convinced that my son missed a spot in the SUV's trunk when he originally searched for the cake. By this time, I was laughing too hard to get angry. My wonderfully patient, friend wondered if we made the trip back to the house for nothing. However, after another car search by the two of us, we still produced no cake. My son was doing a room by room search in the house. A few moments later he pops outside with cake in hand.
“Where did you find it!”
“It was sitting on your laptop, in the living room.”
My mind swirled in amazement. I couldn’t understand how the cake got on top of the computer. Then, my dear friend reminded me about the earlier temper tantrum I had when I was trying to get him off the computer and ready to get on the road. At that point, both guys laughed at me, but I laughed the most at myself for my recent acts of daftness. Next time, I will prepare ahead of time--way ahead!
We did show up an hour late. It didn’t matter though, because the second guest of honor was delayed even longer.
At the party, my daughter came up to me and asked if I remembered to bring the birthday gift that she dropped at my house a few days earlier, because she wasn’t sure she could make it, but her plans changed.
“Gift? What gift?"
Until next time, laugh hard--laugh often!
Ta,
WW
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A special green thumb ...
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When you gotta go, You gotta go ...
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This ain’t no bull! Well, okay it is ...
What a Doll!
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drjim
Submitted Comment:
WebWitch! As usual, you deliver the comedic goods! I always enjoy your decent, family-oriented and intense laughs! Way to go! Can't wait 'til the next one gets trotted out!!
Dr J
 Thank you Dr. J, I so appreciate the heartfelt feedback. It pleases me that you enjoy my Newsletters.
Acme 
Submitted Comment:
Fab newsletter WW! Isn't it amazing that we often only remember the punishment and not the crime? Oh, school days, ancient and modern, make for some great comedy moments
Crime, Acme--Moi? No, it was a mere infraction--perhaps my eraser was worn down too much or I failed to straighten out my uniform bow tie.
You’re right, I only remember being punished. Since I had to write the Catechism so often, I can only believe that I gave those nuns a run for their tuition money.
John .45 
Emailed comment:
GOOD ONE
Just read your March comedy letter.
PS I had to write out the Constitution ... I figured over my 8 years I must
have written it out ~200 times.
John
Thanks, John, for the comment. Yes, I do remember you having to write the Constitution. I believe I was bribed into doing that for you, too, BTW! Hey, what are little sister’s for, right? I don’t call you Big Bad John, for nothing!
Elaine's Beary Limited*~
Submitted Comment:
I did something like that when I was in High school and ended up in all sorts of trouble so I can see where your coming from But that sure made a good story.
Thank you for the feedback, Elaine. I’m glad you enjoyed the story. I am sorry it brought back some memories of your getting in trouble for doing the same thing.
francie
Submitted Comment:
Sorry I missed this edition, I had to pull it from archives, rendering feedback useless. However, I felt compelled to send my appreciation.
I know I will enjoy the pieces highlighted in this newsletter.
I know all about nice little Catholic girls. What does a ten year old confess as a sin? I had to make them up! francie.
If you found it, you didn’t miss it at all. I am happy you enjoyed the Newsletter. Aren’t those archives handy?!!!
Ssshhhhhhh! We nice Catholic girls don’t sin, thus we must make up something to confess, right? I agree, that at ten-years-old, the sins are rather boring to confess.
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Amazon's Price: $ 12.95
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Comedy: April 01, 2009 Issue [#2970]
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