This week: Yeah ... Ain't Gonna Happen! Edited by: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ 2025  
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I always have grand ideas of this being a leaner, meaner me, year. I actually follow through with it half a year, year after year.  Until ... |
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New Year's resolutions? Not me. Through the years I've always secretly resolved to lose weight, exercise more. But, I found that if I didn't speak those words out loud, I might have a chance. So, I always resolve to do better once I get to Florida because it's easier. I never do the work harder stuff -- I like to work smarter.
Florida has always been the saving grace once the chill of autumn has hit New England. There's not too much activity I enjoy in the cold weather. It's tough on arthritis. Plus, the only form of exercise that would pop up close to home is shoveling snow. Definitely not easy on the joints.
This past fall, I prepared to pack up and do my usual snowbird travel to Florida. I couldn't wait to get into the heated pool and do all my water exercise. Easy on the joints and lots of sunshine to suck up the vitamin D. It is the perfect answer to catch up on the secret, silent, promise of getting toned up and losing a few pounds without injuring the joints. Those handy, dandy aqua weights are amazing at toning up the arms. You know those bat wings that become very visible when you wave to someone? I always look around me to be sure there's no small child close by. If I wave with abandon, I could possible knock the poor tyke down from those swinging wings in motion.
You can imagine my utter disappointment when I reached Florida in November and found the pool closed. Not just closed for cleaning or minor repair. This pool was closed all summer to the dismay of the permanent residents, and will continue to be closed close to, if not surpassing the time the snowbirds leave to go back up North.
The pool is broken. The repairs will be extensive. Pump work, drain work, sealing, coating concrete repairs. The list goes on. Since nothing has yet started, our hopes seem to fade.
There's always the beach where exercise is a matter of avoiding being beaten up by the roaring Atlantic Ocean's rough waves. The waves get more exercise than I, since I'm the one being crushed down, spun around and thoroughly sanded from head to toes. To think people pay for dermabrasion. Go to the sea and tell me they can do better than mother nature. And it's free!
So, I guess walking the community's circle around the lake will be the thing to do. Of course blisters will happen and a bunion will flair up. Don't judge. Being a car hop in my youth introduced me to callouses and eventually as age began to set in ... a bunion started.
So there it is, folks. 'Tis the year for trying out the equipment in the exercise room. Sitting and peddling and adding a little weight resistance sounds promising.
Yeah. Right. Who am I kidding?
Well, that's all the exercise commitments avoidance she wrote for this edition of the Comedy Newsletter.
Until next time--laugh hard, laugh often!
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| | | Dead Cert (18+)
When a "character flaw" might get you out of that hole it got you into in the first place.
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Comedy: January 15, 2025 Issue [#12929]
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