This week: Why Are You Still Talking? Edited by: Jayngle Bells  
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| Let's take a break from the broad-based concept of Is action a stand-alone genre? and focus on one small, but important detail: the annoying conversations in action sequences. |
| ASIN: B085272J6B |
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Amazon's Price: $ 9.99
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There you are, immersed in your book (or movie). You've made it through the backstory. You grit your teeth alongside the protagonist, each setback steeling your resolve to see him through to his triumph.
You're engrossed.
Everything quickens as time stands still. You connect the dots of the story beats up to now. The antagonist enters the room, or the big final event is ready to go down.
The tension is palpable.
The author has nailed it.
Here it comes....right after you sit through this monologue.
And just like that, pop! The tension bubble is burst and you're left wondering how any of this could possibly work to hold your attention.
Why is there so much chatter? How can they pull off their action sequence with all the yapping? If the antagonist is going to keep talking, why is the protagonist simply sitting there listening to it? Yes, there are exceptions - but they are generally masterstrokes of good writing. For the most part, your audience is wondering why the heck the protagonist doesn't just get on with it, already. Take the bad guy out and save us the tension-killing wordsmithing.
The choreography of action is high-pressure, fast paced, and you should sense the urgency - whether it's an action, the next step in a sequence, or a confrontation. In order for your reader to keep it straight, you want to sharpen the focus, not dilute it. The more intricately you describe each move, and the more information you layer over that, the more detail your reader loses. Great action scenes are riddled with details - mostly created by your reader's imagination. Give them just enough to get there.
The same is true for dialogue. While some dialogue is fine, so long as it keeps to or exposes a new side of the character, too much banter destroys rhythm and can create a wretched anticlimactic arc. This is generally the opposite of what you want.
While you may argue this is no time to show another side of a character, if it's done well, there's no reason not to. To make it work, there should have been a running theme, undercurrent or indication prior that may have flown under the radar or have worked itself into misleading your readers as to the why.
While comic book action often breaks the "shush and get on with it" rule (and is often an expectation of the genre), one of my favorite examples is an exchange from The Avengers, when the odds seem awfully bad, and the team needs The Hulk's particular abilities:
CAPTAIN AMERICA
Dr. Banner, now might be a really good time for you to get angry.
BRUCE BANNER
That's my secret, Captain. I'm always angry.
Our discovery: Banner isn't a normal guy who sometimes rages; he's a raging guy who somehow manages to be normal for periods of time. Say what you will about the movies or comic books, but there's a lot of emotional baggage to unbox in those few lines.
We don't get the benefit of absorbing that outside of the gut punch, because it's straight into Hulk action after he says it, and that's okay. It's a line with a lasting impression and there was lots of dissection about what it meant.
Just like choreography, you want surgical precision. If the characters are fighting, they're likely out of breath. Even if they're not, they should be tactical in what they're doing, not working out the details of eloquent conversation. Fast. Sharp. Crisp.
The movie Ocean's Eleven is a good example of when there's a lot of talking, until there's not. The dialogue and narration is prolific - but not when the key operational elements are shown (except where the dialogue is the element).
In The Blade Itself, Joe Abercrombie opens the book with an action scene. It's filled with detail - but just enough for you to build the world and all that's happening for yourself. For the entire chapter, there's about a half-dozen pieces of dialogue - each piece a single word, and none longer than a syllable. Unless you want to count the scream as multiple syllables, but as a scream, it can be as long as or short as you imagine.
And that's the fun of it. Keeping up the pace with purposeful and intense staccato dialogue punctuations won't interrupt the rhythm you've worked so hard to create and can keep your readers engaged and your dialogue memorable.
After all, while we all hope the entirety of our work will be committed to the audience's memory, more often than not, readers will remember the overall idea and the things that grabbed them most. For some, it's a vividly rendered scene. For others, it's a stunning twist. And for yet others, it's a great piece of dialogue.
Write your dialogue with purpose - especially during action scenes. |
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Action/Adventure: June 15, 2022 Issue [#11416]
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