This week: Food for Fodder Edited by: Lornda~Thoughts with Bikerider More Newsletters By This Editor
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"My mom made two dishes: Take it or Leave it." ~Stephen Wright - American Stand-up Comedian
"I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, “Well, that’s not going to happen.” ~ Rita Rudner - American Comedian
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand." ~ Barbara Johnson - Writer
"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie." ~ Jim Davis – American Cartoonist
"We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons." ~ Alfred E. Neuman - Fictitious mascot and cover boy of the American humor magazine Mad.
Read how memories of food can spawn comedy gems for your story!
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A lady came into a shop and asked for fourteen scoops of ice cream with nuts.
The man behind the counter asked, "Do you want a cherry with that?"
The lady replied, "No, I'm on a diet."
When I read this joke, it reminded me of a family story about my sister. She worked in a deli-type place and served customers specialty sandwiches. They offered a variety of unique toppings, and one day, an elderly lady seemed confused on what to choose. My sister suggested that the grilled onions go well with this type of sandwich. The lady’s eyes glanced at the onions and then she stared at my sister. Slowly, her hand moved up to in front of her face. She extended her index finger and said, “One onion.” It took every fiber of self-control for my sister not to laugh. She calmly wrapped the Bratwurst tucked into a homemade bun with the lonely strand of onion and told the woman to have a great day!
I couldn’t help but think that this elderly lady would make an interesting character for a story. I thought of other food stories that are fodder for future stories. There’s one family story we tell all the time. I wrote about it in a past newsletter, but it’s a classic gem and deserves another highlight:
Picture a family function. The table is spread with an array of goodies. My mother arrived with a crystal plate full of her newest creation. My jaw dropped, and my sister announced how good the treats looked. The problem was they resembled something her seven cats left behind in the litter box. Chocolate covered logs with who knows what inside. Later, after my mother's thirty minute explanation, we found out they have peanut butter and that "crunchy rice cereal" inside. The recipe said to roll the dough mixture into one-inch balls, but she didn't want to waste her time rolling forty of them, so she shaped them into logs. With any future family functions, we always asked each other: "Hey, is mom bringing the Turds?"
Another classic food story happened when I was a kid. I had a brand new Easy Bake Oven , and I baked my father a little chocolate cake. He stopped working in his office and ate the whole thing. The next day, I brought him a four-layer chocolate cake, and when I came in, he looked at me horrified. I later found out cake isn’t one of his favorite desserts. I’ll leave you with one of my latest baking endeavors – sour dough bread. It wasn’t the usual recipe. It had to be gluten-free and it had the same concept as the regular sour dough process — do all the mixing and throw away some of it for fourteen days then, bake some bread. Working with gluten-free flour is tricky, so I was interested to see if it would be a success. After waiting all day to get it ready to bake, I can report that the inside of it tasted great, but the crust was hard like the Rock of Gibraltar. The good news is, I still have all of my teeth.
Family stories have an endless supply of fodder to add to your writing. I could write a story based on an elderly lady who wanted only one grilled onion, a kid who baked endless little cakes in an Easy Bake Oven , or rock-hard sour dough bread. So think about your own memories, you never know what Comedy gems are waiting for you!
Recipe Link to the Classic Family Dessert
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Food is a popular subject. Look at all the items I found!
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Have you had any food disasters that made you laugh? What’s your favorite food?
In my last newsletter, "Snappy Beginnings" , I asked the question: Do you have trouble writing the beginning to hook the reader? Do you have any favorite beginnings from stories you’ve written or read?
Santeven Quokklaus : "Here's the opening paragraph to a short novella of mine called Here be Twonk:
Think tanks are an oddly named beast. Very little thinking goes on, and they hardly resemble large-gunned, tracked vehicles with heavy armour designed to withstand an attack, although they do tend to destroy everything in their path. Still, being on the board of a think tank, especially a government one, is quite a lucrative deal. Of course, that brings its own issues, primary of which is: why bring things to an end when there’s money to be made by drawing it out? Oh sure, the world might be under threat, but there are discussions to be had, dagnabbit!
Fun opening. It hooked me right in.
Maryann: "I loved your jokes at the beginning of this newsletter. It was, indeed, a snappy hook!"
Thanks! I always have fun time searching for them.
Quick-Quill : "I actually was intrigued by a couple of the stories you highlighted. The first lines were catchy. Most times they aren’t what draws me to read a story. It’s what follows in the set up that grabs me to continue."
That's always important, too.
Comments from the newsfeed:
TheBusmanPoet : "I don't worry about such mundane things. If the reader likes what I wrote that's fine. If they don't that's fine too. I just write what comes out. Put it in my documents and edit it from there, then post it. I write not to be published or trying to be famous. I don't need to be. I retired at the age of 47 with just a HS degree and live extremely comfortably. I write as an escape. Just like when I listen to music. It's an escape and nothing more. I'll let others worry about being famous and selling their material. I don't need the recognition. Does this statement ruffle a few feathers. I would imagine it would but that's on those that it does bother. Not myself."
LorenIsOneOfMyNames : "I think I do fairly decently with hooks."
graybabe : "I started my novel with a shocking murder by a cad who went on to seduce an old friend who was a lawyer to get him out of trouble. Some or a majority of my readers found it difficult to accept and gave me poor reviews. I'm rather unhappy about it but I wanted to write a story about redemption. Apparently they hated the character so much they didn't want him to get off."
woolwaulker : ""It was a dark and Trumpy night..."
jolanh : "I know a captain who likes his hooks...Nailed it"
jdennis01jaj : "All of a sudden, the lights went out. No forewarning, no musical interlude, just darkness, and we all stood frozen in silence, wondering if the movie was about to start when someone in the crowd screamed, "We're all standing in our front yards, in our underwear, the movie isn't going to start. What the hell is happening?"
Anna Marie Carlson : "I can come up with something good at the beginning it seems, but I just go with the flow for the rest of the story and hope that there is something in the story that can hook the reader. The more I write, the more hooks, I'm hoping can keep their attention."
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