%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4799995 |
 | Power Struggle  [13+] An intense disturbance changes a young man's life forever...  |
| (5.0)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: There is something intensely scary about a mystery that isn’t solved. Here, the main character seems to know exactly what is happening in the basement, but the readers don’t get to find out. I’m not sure who is at more of a disadvantage here, the man who is faced with appears to be his worst fear, or the readers who are, figuratively speaking, in the dark and don’t even know what it is he fears so much. The story doesn’t give them time to breathe; you jumped straight in with the action, with the main character returning home and finding every single appliance in the house being on and turned up to the loudest volume. At this point, he seems a bit creeped out, but he doesn’t seem to suspect the real nature of the strange occurrence. All he is occupied with is shutting down the noise. You described both the sounds and the silence that followed very well, and I could imagine it perfectly from details like this: it was like a black shag carpet thrown over his head in a hot attic It was at that point that I figured the silence wouldn’t be a good thing, and sure enough, Jeffrey realised that there was something worse than the noise. I found the whole set-up very effective to make the scene as scary as possible, and his reaction to realising what was going on was very believable, even if the readers didn’t know what it was.  Suggestions: I don’t have any technical suggestions; I didn’t notice any errors and you even chose a slightly larger font size to make reading the story on a screen easier. The only suggestion I have would be to choose a couple of genres in addition to ‘Horror/Scary’ to give the readers more of an idea what kind of story they are about to read. It might even be a hint as to the scary thing in the basement if you chose ‘Supernatural’ or ‘Paranormal’, but if there is a more ordinary explanation, perhaps ‘Dark’ would work.  Final Thoughts: The tale ended rather abruptly and I wonder if the description hints at there being more to it. I suppose the main character’s life would be changed by an experience like this, but he clearly knew who or what was responsible for the disturbance and it felt like the story was meant to continue. Perhaps it’s just wishful thinking because I would like to find out what Jeffrey already knew at that point. It was certainly a great place to stop because the readers (well, this reader, anyway) will want to read more. A great read!   A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group" This review is affiliated with The B.E.A.R. Fund , a community project that let's you earn exclusive merit badges just by reviewing! My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You last responded to this review 02/13/2025 @ 9:18pm EST