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Review #4799450
Viewing a review of:
 Mystic Eyes Open in new Window. [E]
Your mystic eyes--like fireflies
by JMW Author Icon
Review of Mystic Eyes  Open in new Window.
Review by Jeff Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The Free Folk  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*Firework*    Happy Writing.com Account Anniversary from "Anniversary Reviews" Open in new Window.    *Firework*


Hi JMW

Congratulations on your account anniversary! I'm sending this review in honor of the occasion. *Party*


Positives

I really enjoyed the imagery in this piece. I thought you did a great job conveying some really vivid details in comparatively few works. Nice job!


Suggestions

Some of the lines felt like they went on a little long, with multiple pauses and sections, which gave the structure a bit of a run-on feel at times. If you were looking to revise this piece, you might want to play around with the line breaks a little to experiment with different structures and pacing.


Overall

Overall, this was an enjoyable read and you're off to a great start with it. Well done!


I hope you've found this review helpful. If so, please consider paying it forward by reviewing the work of another Writing.com author!

Respectfully,

Jeff Author IconMail Icon
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