Hello Sumojo

Here is a review for your "Gigi" .

You always have the last say on your work, and you are under no obligation to follow my suggestions.

Comments and Observations:

What a story, so powerful and moving; however, it is a fact of life most of us don't have the guts to even think about. I applaud you for writing it.

Child exploitation is a heart-wrenching reality in quite a few parts of the world. Your carefully chosen details and vivid descriptions transported me to the seedier parts of Bangkok. Your storytelling make the tragic situation of Gigi and the other kids feel so very real.

The contrasts between the innocence and vulnerability of the children and their circumstances against the predatory nature of their environment moved me deeply. Gigi's youth and forced maturity are particularly poignant, as she tries to survive in her dangerous world.

The dialogue and interactions among all the characters impress even more the harsh reality of the main character.

Tony and Jan's roles in the story provide additional perspective that deepen the awareness of Gigi's and that of other children's problems. This couple's reactions and concerns highlight the complexities and the difficulties for finding solutions. That you left it at that, without a solution, also highlights the nature of the problem.

Your writing style is descriptive and powerful, for you paint a striking picture of the setting and the characters.

The pacing is especially good since, throughout the piece, you build up the tension for strong emotional impact.

The ending was haunting for me with Gigi returning to the "Man's place" and her bleak conditions.

I suggest you try adding more sensory details such as the sounds, smells, and feelings of the setting into the last scene and see if you'd like it more.

Anyhow, as it is, this is a very powerful, convincing story.

Suggestions on the text as to grammar, usage, and punctuation

I saw no problems in this area.

Best wishes with your work.



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .