Hi Maria,

This is a wonderful story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering how Cynthia will try to get her parents' attention. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a young girl who feels unloved. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characterization is fully developed and believable. The story focuses on Cynthia, and she comes across as a real person. There is no dialogue but it is not needed here. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. I did come across a few structural issues that need your attention:


1)for once notice=-"notice" should be "noticed".

2)Cynthia felt like an outcast in her house so she decided to run away-There should be a comma after "house".

3)She stood up, took her bags and went back to her parent She knelt down and apologized to them.-Should read "She stood up, took her bags and went back to her parents. She knelt down and apologized to them."

The story is consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.