Hi hihohyena,

This is a fantastic story. The tone is tinged with excitement. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if Ronan and Darragh will actually plunge into the water below. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a young man who is nervous when his prince suggests they plunge off a cliff and into the water below. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.