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 Review #4772902 |
 | Flash fiction  [E] Some contest entries for Daily Flash Fiction.  |
| (4.0)  My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines. THE STORYIt's hot in the Sultan's Arab country to he goes to the science council looking for ways to beat the heat.  WHAT I LIKEDCloud seeding is not the smartest way to "beat the heat." I did like the Sultan. He was a very relatable character.  POV NARRATION/TENSEThis is told in the 3rd person omniscent. Past tense is used in the story. DIALOGUEThe dialogue accents the narration. OPENING PARAGRAPHThe opening paragraph sets up the dilemma - how is the Sultan going to beat the heat? The opening engages the reader and keeps them reading. CHARACTERSThe Sultan is the main character and you can feel his concern for his country. Habib is the guy who mixes the chemicals. I liked his work ethic. FLOW & PACINGThe opening set up the problem, the middle set on a solution and end wasn't for everyone. Well done. MECHANICSI did not notice and spelling/punctuation mistakes. My only suggestion here, and it's minor and a matter of style - maybe increase the font a little to make it easier on the eyes. PARTING THOUGHTSThe title fits the story. This story was inspired what happened earlier to "certain desert country." earlier in the year. It's a light read, but the ending should give the reader pause to think about the consequences of intentional cloud seeding. The word count was listed in the dropnote and the prompt was was highlighted in accordance with the rules. Good luck in the Bard's Hall Contest.  
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You responded to this review 09/02/2024 @ 9:52am EDT