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 Review #4767702 |
  |  | Castle's Chessboard  [E] Random Writing, Blogs and Adventures  |
| (5.0)   Greetings, KingsSideCastle! I am reviewing this because I am part of "I Write in 2024" and you happened to post previous to my entry.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest. The Positives/What I Liked I love the simplicity of this piece, and yet there is larger story between the lines. You mentioned you were inspired by "The Little Mermaid" and I definitely can see that. Great job!  My favorite part were the opening lines...As I was drowning in the sea, a Mermaid came and rescued me.  Your flow, rhyme, and meter are amazing. Nothing distracted me whatsoever. Suggestions/Comments to ConsiderThere is nothing I would add, subtract, or change in any way. Your punctuation is perfect and there are no typos that I have noticed. Final ThoughtsNice work! You've done a great job with this prompt and only an eight-line limit.  A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group" Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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You responded to this review 08/05/2024 @ 7:10pm EDT