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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4756337
Review #4756337
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Review by ScaryBee
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: | (4.5)
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*Note1* My review is based on professional editing points. It is meant to be honest, encouraging, and respectful in accordance with WDC guidelines.

*Reading* THE STORY

A young girl goes through a traumatic experience, taking her life on a very different turn.

*Smile*WHAT I LIKED

I thought the ending really brought the story full circle and ended on a note of hope.

*Star* POV NARRATION/TENSE

This is told in the 3rd person limited from Emily's perspective. Past tense is used in the story.

*Star*OPENING PARAGRAPH

A quote sets a hopeful tone for the story.

The next paragraph sets the time and place and puts the reader in the moment.

*Star*CHARACTERS

Emily was a survivor and it's that aspect that makes her relatable to the reader.


*Star*FLOW & PACING

It worked well to tell a full story.

*Star*MECHANICS

I did not notice and spelling/punctuation mistakes. My only suggestion here, and it's minor and a matter of style - maybe increase the font a little to make it easier on the eyes.

*Star*PARTING THOUGHTS

The title hints at the story. The author uses a good economy words to tell a poignant story.

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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 06/11/2024 @ 1:01am EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4756337