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Given: Jun 9, 2024 at 10:04am
Length: 1,608 Characters |
1,249 w/o WritingML
Greetings, Sara Persaud ! And welcome to Writing.com! If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.
First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.
What I Liked
This poem describes what mania feels like. For one of your genre options, you've chosen Experience. Who knows better than someone who's been through mania, right? I became absorbed in this piece, often connecting to what you so clearly describe. My favorite lines are:
a broken mirror in the sun
my micro seconds of genius
the fireworks of connecting dots
I like that you chose not to use any capital letters to begin your lines. I can't believe I'm going to say this, but even the tiny font seems to fit in with this. (I normally prefer the larger font--easier to read for me.)
Suggestions/Comments to Consider
I believe micro seconds is one word.microseconds
I've no other suggestions. Great work!
Final Thoughts
Very nice. Good job. Once again, Welcome to WDC! Hope to see you around the site!
Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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