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Review #4748266
Viewing a review of:
 Born To Be Wild Open in new Window. [E]
A nutty squirrel tries desperately to communicate.
by SandraLynn Author Icon
Review of Born To Be Wild  Open in new Window.
Review by Annette Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
A "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window. review from
The Free Folk image for G.o.T.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.


Hello SandraLynn Author Icon

First impression:

The title together with the intro line drew me right in. I also once wrote a short story about a squirrel mom who lives in a park. Animals are so much fun to watch and write about.

What works:

The narration from the first person point of view of a squirrel worked perfectly for this story. I was right there in the mind of the critter, wondering and full of anxiety about all the ruckus outside. And these people have the gall to burn meat under a tree dwelling vegetarian's house! So rude. They deserve to get pelted with acorns.

What needs work:

You could add a thumbnail image to this item. StoryMistress has made a whole library for us. I am certain there is a squirrel available for this story.

I wasn't entirely sure from the description: was that a deck that the people built with a barbeque grill on it?

Final thoughts:

I noticed this story was only written today. Most likely for Game of Thrones as you mention two prompts at the bottom. You should make the word count a little more prominent. It could get overlooked down there. I am speaking from experience as someone who asks for word count in my activities. Make it easy on the host to give you maximum points.

Annette
"The WDC Angel Army" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/26/2024 @ 5:43pm EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4748266