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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4748021
Review #4748021
Viewing a review of:
 Parlor Open in new Window. [E]
Written in 8th grade, I think.
by BeHereBook Author Icon
Review of Parlor  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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Oh, this is a nice one. The childish simplicity of the theme is gently developed and drawn along to the happiness of the mature conclusion, as we see the narrator gradually moving through different stages of life, connected by the threads of an ice cream parlor and the gradually evolving metaphor of the sea.

I do love a good poem, and this captures so much of the essence of life. We see the kindness of the narrator’s companion as they buy them ice cream through the difficulties of life. We see a picture of steadfast fidelity as the relationship continues through the years and the metaphors shift to reflect the passage of time.

I would recommend using Size 4 Verdana font to make the most of your presentation here at WdC, as having a small text flanked by the busyness of the sidebars tends to draw attention away from your item. You may even want to center the text or choose a cute shade of pink like the ice cream… but that would probably be too goofy.

I really enjoyed this poem. Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *HeartG*

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