\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4747458
Review #4747458
Viewing a review of:
 Shadow Over July Open in new Window. [13+]
A taste of memory lane alongside an unsteady future.
by Creeper Of The Realm Author Icon
Review of Shadow Over July  Open in new Window.
Review by JayNaNoOhNo Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Image for Activity


This is a "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window. review!


Hello, Creeper Of The Realm !

*Checkb*Overall Impression:
This poem evokes a poignant sense of nostalgia mixed with the bittersweet reality of the present. It beautifully contrasts the joyous memories of summers past with a sense of loss and in the present, captured with strong imagery.

*Checkb*Form, Rhythm, Cadence, and Style:
As free verse, you have a flexible structure that mirrors the ebb and flow of memories and present realities. The cadence is gentle and reflective, with strategic line breaks that give weight to the poem's more impactful moments, such as "And yet..."

*Checkb*Content:
Through its vivid imagery and thoughtful contrasts, the poem explores themes of environmental degradation and the fleeting nature of time. The sense of loss is evident in the lamenting of the failure to recognize cherished moments in real-time and the polluted air that now taints the beauty of the scene one holds.

*Checkb*Grammar and Mechanics:
The poem is generally well done; however, there are a couple of areas where clarity could be enhanced. For instance, the line "Summertime wasted" could be rephrased to avoid potential confusion about whether summer itself is wasted or time during summer is wasted. You could also consider more punctuation for pauses to enhance the reflective quality of the poem.

*Checkb*Final Thoughts:
This is a poem that will resonate with many people, myself included. There's a lovely interplay between a cherished and slightly nostalgic past and the uncertainty of the future. The poem's rather subtle call to cherish every moment is both touching and timely, as is the undercurrent of a call to action so the future does not have to be bleak.

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

JayNaNoOhNo Author Icon*Smile*


My approach to reviews: "I'll Explain, but not Disclaim" Open in new Window.


The views and opinions in this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and, therefore, do not necessarily reflect the group, activity, and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4747458