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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742679
Review #4742679
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Rated: | (5.0)
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Greetings from the House of Mormont!
By participating in a Writing.com activity called "Game of Thrones" Open in new Window., I am in no way endorsing the GoT franchise or identifying as a fan thereof. I’m here to help my team win *Smile*

Hey, this was cute. You’ve nailed the rhyme and meter to create a story out of the prompt that has us smiling and chuckling along with Babbit as we see him go from being a grumpy rabbit to being happy, with a stern warning from his fairy godmother. That’s a hilarious twist at the end, that they didn’t seem too impressed with his newfound joy. Sometimes happy people are like that, you know? “Ugh, what are you so happy about?” *Laugh*

I have nothing to suggest here by way of corrections; I’m not an expert at poetic structure and meter, going mainly by instinct when writing my own. Mostly I’m too lazy to count syllables and measure meter. So I’m not qualified to tell you that it doesn’t measure somewhere along the lines… looks fine to me. You’ve used good advanced formatting techniques. I would recommend adding a third genre to it to increase visibility when browsing and to open more opportunities to be nominated for a Quill Award. “Children’s” would be good.

I greatly enjoyed reading this. Thanks for sharing, take care and keep writing *HeartG*

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/07/2024 @ 3:16pm EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742679