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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4736348
Review #4736348
Viewing a review of:
 Adam's Hands Open in new Window. [13+]
What it be like if we saw the effect of out actions once its done.
by Isedora Klopper Author Icon
Review of Adam's Hands  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings and welcome to writing.com *HeartRate2*

I've been seeing this on the Read a Newbie sidebar for a while and finally had a chance to read it.

This is a touching and heartfelt story with an important message about holding onto your life for the sake of the ones that love you. Even the most difficult day is not worth inflicting such pain on them.

Your flow is good and simple enough to understand. I have a couple of minor formatting suggestions: one, this is in need of spaces between paragraphs. If I was using my iPad it would be pretty much one long block of text. Also, since I'm on mobile I can't tell what size font you've used, but I'll make the standard recommendation for size 4 Verdana.

Perhaps the title could be different, as we assume from combining it with the subtitle that it's referring to the questionable actions of Adam. We are somewhat surprised to learn that Adam was her son who is now her spirit guide in the other world.

I need to be sure to say to anyone who sees this: your life is worth living.
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call or text the 24/7 US suicide prevention hotline at 988.


Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *Smile* *HeartBroken*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 03/11/2024 @ 3:34pm EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4736348