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Given: Feb 17, 2024 at 12:57am
Length: 749 Characters |
655 w/o WritingML
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Anniversary Reviews (E) Celebrate Writing.Com member account anniversaries with reviews. #1565040 by Annette
Hallo!
Here I am again!
The title, brief description and genres work. Maybe add a cover pic. The layout is easy to read.
The beginning caught my attention, especially the smarmy smile. Immediately one knew the character was up to something.
You held the suspense well. I wanted to know what was coming and wondered if it might have a comic twist, but it didn't - it was sinister.
Just a quibble - at the actual moment of the incident, I had to read twice to understand what had happened! Is it just me, or would you like to re-work that sentence, maybe to two shorter sentences to pack more punch?
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