Passageways [18+] Flash fiction entry |
An Angel Army Review Hi BeeSmith . Good morning. I found your offering in the Read & Review section. I'm JACE , and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "Passageways" . I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your story. Overall Impression. You display a great deal of emotion in such a short piece. On the one hand, you show the uselessness and desperateness of war with the turmoil inside Terrano. Your mother, however, displays a freedom that cannot be taken away. She has a mindset that gives her strength that Terrano desires. Good job conveying those sentiments. Technical and Editorial Considerations. In this section I normally list those areas that relate specifically to the mechanics of your writing--punctuation, grammar, spelling, etc. Your writing mechanics are very good. I found no issues with your writing technique. My Rating. 4.5. Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinion. Reviewed by JACE My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
|