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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4723598
Review #4723598
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY!!! from "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*
Celebrating your writing this month with a review.


Happy Account Anniversary Stormy Lady ,

"Once was" opens with a poignant reflection on the transient nature of life and love, employing concise and stark imagery to convey the inevitable passage of time and change. The brevity of each stanza mirrors the brevity of the moments described, emphasizing the fleeting nature of warmth, color, strength, and melody.

Stylistically, the poem embraces simplicity and directness, allowing the stark contrast between past and present to resonate with clarity. The use of repetition with "once was" serves as a powerful refrain, creating a rhythmic cadence that underscores the theme of transience. Each couplet acts as a snapshot, capturing the essence of what once was and juxtaposing it with the stark reality of what is now.

Thematically, the poem revolves around the universal theme of impermanence and the inevitability of change. The progression from warmth to coldness, color to aging, strength to brokenness, and song to silence paints a vivid portrait of the inevitable cycle of life. The emotional resonance lies in the simplicity of the language, making it relatable and evoking a contemplative response from the reader.

Poetic devices, such as metaphor and personification, enhance the impact of the poem. The wind becomes a symbol of change, shifting from warm to cold, mirroring the emotional shift in the speaker's reflections. Similarly, the aging flower and the broken love serve as powerful metaphors for the passage of time and the fragility of human connections.

Suggestions for further refinement might include exploring additional sensory details to deepen the emotional impact. Describing the sensations of warmth turning to coldness or the visual transformation of a colorful flower into an old one could enhance the reader's connection to the evolving imagery. Additionally, considering variations in line length or experimenting with stanza breaks could add a dynamic element to the form, further accentuating the emotional nuances within each couplet.

I hope we have you back. You are missed. A belated anniversary celebration of your impact on this internet community.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army
and Account Anniversary Reviewer
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