This is what I've become [E] This is a very dark poem I wrote back when I was going through a very hard time. |
A WDC Power Review Hi Underground_Man . I'm JACE , and I have the honor of reading and reviewing your offering "This is what I've become" . I invite your attention to the comments below. Please bear in mind these notes are from one on the outside looking in; ultimately only you can decide what's right for your story. Overall Impression. I selected your piece to review precisely because of the subject matter, only from the opposite standpoint. I was unable to help my now ex-wife because of my inability to understand what she was going through. I'm never experienced depression and didn't know how to even begin to help--at least help on my own. We both had to get professional help. That helped us maintain a more even keel until our divorce some 15 years later. We remain friends. She tried to explain what she felt. Some of your phrases were similar indeed. I know the pain was there but was unable to help. In your disclaimer you state anyone in this situation should seek professional help. I hope you did. Technical and Editorial Considerations. In this section I normally list those areas that relate specifically to the mechanics of your writing--punctuation, grammar, spelling, etc. I usually refrain from commenting on free form formatting because of its very nature. However, I noted one typo: emplore should be implore. My Rating. 4.5. Thank you for sharing this offering. Please accept these comments as offered in friendship and support. They are but my humble opinion. Reviewed by JACE ** Image ID #1386062 Unavailable ** My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
|