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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4720943
Review #4720943
Viewing a review of:
PPC 4  [18+]
Entries 4 - 56 will be the 52 weeks of poems for Promptly Poetry Round 4
by Ned
         Review for entry/chapter: "Norwyn Nedengrass - Week 5" 
Review of PPC 4  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello Ned,

I peered into your Promptly Poetry selections and was immediately drawn with curiosity from the title of this poem. I’m offered a view of an enchanting world, the vivid imagery of a lush, green fairy garden immediately captivates the senses. The small windmill, proudly painted in the brightest white, captured this reader as central figure in the magical landscape. Its arms, stained as brown as wood, added a touch of rustic charm, creating a visual symphony that unfolded with each line.

Your choice of introducing Norwyn Nedengrass, the gnome, as the guardian of this ethereal space added a delightful layer to the narrative. His watchful presence near the pink petunias by the babbling brook not only established a sense of connection with nature but also hinted at the underlying theme of resilience in the face of external challenges.

The playful interaction between Norwyn and the busy body bumble bees introduced a subtle tension, creating a dynamic atmosphere within the garden. The bees' taunts about the motionless windmill cleverly echoed the theme of persistence in the face of skepticism. Norwyn's stoic response, standing guard for hours, revealed a quiet strength that resonated with the overarching message.

The rhythmic flow and rhyme scheme in your poem added a musical quality, enhancing the whimsical atmosphere of the fairy garden. The repetition of sounds, as seen in "busy body bumble bees" and "Bumble-bodied busy bees," not only added a delightful cadence but also emphasized the persistent buzzing that became a backdrop to Norwyn's steadfastness.

In terms of suggestions, exploring the emotional depth of Norwyn's character could further this piece. Perhaps delve into his thoughts and feelings, providing readers with a more profound understanding of his contentment despite the challenges. Additionally, you might experiment with varying the rhyme scheme to add a touch of unpredictability, mirroring the ever-changing nature of a garden.

This poem was a pleasure to consume and consider for feedback.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4720943