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 Review #4720912 |
 | Nepenthe  [E] The definition of the title word is really where this poem's meaning lies.  |
| (5.0)| Hello H. M. Marie ,Upon prying in to look upon "Nepenthe," I found myself drawn toward the tumultuous emotion that resonates through your title-driven poem. The opening lines, "I would rend the skies – fracture the empyrean ether with a scream," set a powerful tone, immediately invoking a sense of passion and urgency. The vivid imagery of tearing through the celestial realm creates a strong visual impact, and it effectively captivates the reader's attention. Your choice of style is notable, blending the ethereal with the visceral. The juxtaposition of "fiery legions" in the second stanza contrasts with the delicacy of "gossamer Moment" in the closing lines. This duality enhances the emotional depth, painting a nuanced portrayal of longing and determination. The poem's structure, with its concise yet impactful lines, contributes to the overall intensity, allowing each word to carry significant weight. The theme of relentless pursuit and the desire to reunite permeates throughout the poem, creating a sense of yearning that resonates on a profound level. The metaphorical hunt through the cosmic expanse adds a layer of mystery, inviting readers to explore the depths of emotion embedded in the verses. The use of celestial imagery, such as "meteoric gossamer Moment," elevates the poem to a cosmic scale, infusing it with a transcendent quality. In terms of poetic devices, your incorporation of enjambment enhances the flow, creating a seamless progression from one line to the next. For instance, the enjambment in "fling aside / dust of fiery legions" propels the reader forward, intensifying the urgency of the narrative. Additionally, the repetition of the conditional statement "If I believed" adds a contemplative layer, emphasizing the delicate balance between hope and skepticism. As a suggestion, consider exploring the emotional landscape further by incorporating sensory elements. With the employment of textures, sounds, and scents that accompany the speaker's celestial journey, this could be enriching for the reader's experience. For instance, describing the "fiery legions" with sensory details could amplify the immersive quality of your poem. I found the narrative of this short poem very commanding. Somehow, the structure caused me to look at it upside down. It even reads well backwards, reads as one sentence, because you could start with line eight up to top and it would almost be the same. Or, what appeared to me. Just one of the little things that suggest something is well written, to me. Sincerely, Brian WDC Angel Army Reviewer    To see more of my reviews go to: https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/ripglaedr3 Also at the link above, further information should you or anyone need further attention, feedback or review. Or, just email me, (if just follow up).  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 12/03/2023 @ 5:24pm EST