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Review #4664196
Viewing a review of:
 Hoisting the Torch with No Phobias Open in new Window. [E]
Taking the enlightened stance that fear in sports can be considered a phobia...
by Tim Chiu Author Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)


Hallo!
This one showed up on Read and Review, and I'm glad it did. You wrote it a long time ago, but the relevance of this poem is timeless.

I love the theme! It is unusual, and so apt for poetry. The verse structure and words you've chosen work well to put your message across. It could also be interpreted as a symbolic poem, not only for sport but for any endeavour requiring courage.

My favourite line:
On a brief trek beginning thousands of miles away –

Suggestions:
1. To me personally, the brief description didn't seem to fit the tone of the poem. The poem is powerful, the brief description foreshadows something more mundane.
2. Maybe you'd like to use some WritingML to enhance the look of the poem.
3. There's one line which tripped my reading -
The greatest obstacle, having no fear
Fear is the obstacle, right? Having no fear is the goal ... ?

Thanks for sharing this one!
Write On!
Image created by Gervic, gifted to me by Maryann

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