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![]() | I Like Ike ![]() Nonsense really about things I like and things I like less than most other things. ![]() |
![]() ![]() ![]() Good day to you, Nela Chau ![]() ![]() For the record, I am a casual and very occasional writer of mystery, fantasy, horror, and steampunk, and I try to review in a wide variety of styles and genres. I was the sole Honorable Mention for the 2021 Quill Award for Reviewing, so I'll have to see whether I can do better this year. As I said, I'm no authority, but hopefully my comments will give you some ideas to take your writing in directions you hadn't previously considered. Let me just drop a warning here, and we'll get started. THIRD-PARTY READERS TAKE NOTE: SPOILERS AHEAD The first thing a reader sees before he reads a word is the way the piece looks on the page, the Presentation, as I call it. There are many gaffes to be committed that will send a reader on to the next piece, shaking his head at your ineptitude, but none of those are apparent here, so full marks for presentation. As a footnote, the default font for everything here is a tiny version of Arial, an attractive font to be sure, but at this size it can start looking like the fine print on a used car contract. There are a number of ways to tweak the font here – this review is in 3.5 Verdana, for example – but the easiest way to make Arial "pop" is to place the command {size:3.5} at the head of the text. If you don't like the way it looks, just remove the command and it will revert to its original format. I usually have a lot to say about the importance of paragraphs, but this isn't really a story in the traditional sense, and the flush paragraphs work for it. Full marks here. The story itself, free verse, whatever, has a theme, and it's a nice one. At first you look at it and say, "Here's a list of things this author likes and doesn't like. Interesting, but ultimately pointless." Except that you give it a point, a profound one, with that closing sentence that will have the reader questioning his own response to the things around him for some time to come. That sentence gives what is otherwise a bit of fluff an impact that cannot be ignored. Great job! Another area I always look at is the Mechanics of a piece, the misspelled word, the misplaced comma, the wrong word used that changes the whole meaning of the piece, and I often have a lot to say about this. Not here. I couldn't find one thing to gripe about, and I tip my begoggled patrol cap to your editing skills. SUMMARY: ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ** Image ID #2234711 Unavailable ** "You don't choose writing; writing chooses you." Interested parties may follow my antics at "Invalid Item" ![]()
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