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Review #4643046
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Review by Cubboo! (22!)
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Rated: | (4.0)
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Greetings, lynntarzan, I am reviewing this today as a judge for the "Writing 4 Kids Contest .


*Pencil* First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.

*Boxcheckb* Visually appealing
*Boxcheckb* Easy to understand
*Boxcheckb* Followed the prompt & rules Yes and no. *Wink* The rules asked for a story written about the snow globe in the picture prompt, but I still enjoyed your story. *Bigsmile* I'm also wondering if this was written for another contest, too, which is fine. I just noticed other prompt words that weren't included with the picture prompt. *Whistle* No biggy though! *Laugh*

*Crayons4* Plot: No plot or conflict. Just a nice story about how a librarian had touched the hearts of children years ago, how they remembered her snow globe, and how it had been her dream to go up in a hot air balloon (which she accomplishes.)

*Crayons7* Characters: Mrs. Parker, Father Bicker, and the grown-up children who remembered their librarian fondly.

*Crayons* Dialogue: Flows nicely!

*Crayons5* Technicalities: There are some little punctuation typos I stumbled upon--nothing huge. Here are a few to consider...

“well for me, --> “Well, for me,
important to her”. --> important to her.”
I like that” Jimmy finished. --> I like that,” Jimmy finished.

*Crayons2* Favorites: This grabbed me: This sat on the counter all through the months of November, December and, January. This was a real treat for all of the children who loved looking deep into the watery globe. What was it that was so interesting to them? What did they see?

*Crayons8* Final thoughts: This is a nice piece, written well, good flow, etc. I used to be a library director at a public library for 12 years and before that, I worked at an elementary library and loved it! Now I wish I would've had a snow globe for the students to enjoy!!!

*Note* Have you heard of Keys for Kids? It's a monthly children's devotional magazine and I have a feeling you would be good at writing for them! I've published maybe 20 or so stories/devotionals through them years ago. They pay, too! I think they are through Grand Rapids, Michigan, if you're interested. *Smile*


Have a great day and...*Quill*
  K e e p on W r i t i n g !
Cubby ")
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 01/12/2022 @ 4:16pm EST
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4643046