%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4619117 |
 | Invalid Item  [] |
| (4.5)| A   ReviewMy reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest. First Impression I can definitely see this as the first chapter of a Coming-of-age novel. Unlike when I was a teen-ager in the 70s, the Teen and Young Adult genres are open to gender identity challenges in publishing. We've come a long way since then! Your topic here is very real and truth-be-told, I wouldn't be surprised if publishing houses are interested in finding authors who can write about this topic sensitively. Of course, I'm sure you know there is controversy out there, but there are also real people who are in similar situations experiencing what Michael/Michaela is. Thoughts/Suggestions/Comments enrol  enrollunsual unusual I noticed approximately in the middle of your chapter, you repeat the word just several times.  It's just such an easy word to use, I know.  Again, about in the middle of your chapter, you write about Michaela talking with Dr. Sherman around twelve, thirteen, then fourteen years of age, and then you jump back to their first appointment together (she is twelve) when he asks her to keep a diary to record her thoughts. It felt out of sequence, at least to me.  Favorites Her thoughts ran through her brain so quickly each tripped over the other as they fought for dominance. I love this line! My thoughts trip over each other all the time.  Nice work. And best of luck in the contest! Have a great day and...  K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "
You responded to this review 07/12/2021 @ 5:59pm EDT