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Review #4607202
Viewing a review of:
 Didn't Have To Daddy Open in new Window. [E]
About a step dad that didnt have to
by DEZIRAY ANN CHANCE Author Icon
Review by Dave Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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*LeafO*  Welcome to WdC from the "Newbie Welcome Wagon" Open in new Window. *LeafO*



Greetings, Deziray!

Welcome to this our International Inspiration Station, aka WDC. You are certainly off to a fantastic start by populating your port and finding your way around this vast site in such short order. The following observations are offered in the interest of friendly hospitality and constructive support. Of course, they are nothing more than one person's opinions, so take them or leave them for whatever you think they may be worth.

TITLE:

Like the names of your children, a title gives your brainchild a specific identity. It is also a critical element of your composition, because it is the portal through which a prospective reader must pass to enter the realm of your imagination. It sets the tone and prepares the reader for what is to come. If that entrance does not spark some sort of interest, chances are he or she will move along to the next item, or maybe even the next author.

The title of this composition appeals to that browser's sense of compassion with its reference to the "Daddy"'s options.

CONTENT:

Your narrator captures the essence of this relationship with her reference to specific circumstances and actions, including those for which she is accountable.

PICKY COPY EDIT ITEMS:

1. In second paragraph, "... when I first met you and you, I didn't..."

2. In third paragraph, "...my behavior trying to tech (should be "teach") me right from wrong."

OVERALL IMPRESSION:

This is a very touching exposition, very similar to the hit song by Brad Paisley: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjO1F6oCab8 . Thank you for sharing!

Here's wishing you fair winds as you continue to navigate this universe known as Writing.Com.

Let the creativity flow from your soul! *Cool*
Dave
"The Poet's Place " Open in new Window.
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