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 Review #4590877 |
  Greetings, Solace.Bring, I am reviewing this today as a judge for the "Writing 4 Kids Contest "  . First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest. Visually appealing Easy to understand Followed the prompt & rules Plot / Internal Conflict / Goal: Lula the cow would love to have a Santa hat just like Jim's. Characters: Lulu the milk cow, Dilly (sheep? goat?), the farmer's family which include his kids Jim and Tammy, and the other animals: Jake the plow horse, the chickens and piglets Dialogue: Good dialogue Setting: The barn Technicalities: Farmer and Family don't need to begin with a capital, but you were consistent with it, so I'm okay with it.  No typos. Good job! Favorite: Lulu noticed Dilly licking his lips as he gazed at her lovely Christmas hat.  I loved this visual!  Final thoughts: I wasn't sure if Dilly was a sheep or a goat, but I'm hoping a goat because my daughter has two fainting goats--Daisy & Ferdinand. They are adorable! And I'm sure either one would be happy to eat Lula's new hat. This was a lovely story filled with Christmas wishes and some good visuals. If I had to offer any advice at all, I would recommend a little more conflict perhaps. Dilly is a great character and I also had to smile when Jake the horse winked at Lulu. Good job!Thank you for entering the contest! Have a great day and...  K e e p on W r i t i n g ! Cubby ")
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You responded to this review 01/15/2021 @ 11:26pm EST