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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4546557
Review #4546557
Viewing a review of:
 Conflict's Brewing Open in new Window. [18+]
Conflict is brewing between my two characters - Ryan and Arlynn
by 💙 Carly - aka Joan Watson Author Icon
In affiliation with House of Sensual Prose  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)

Introduction~
*NoteP*          Cadie here reivewing Lesson 3 for Building Emotion.

*AsteriskV*NOTE: This review is only the opinion of one author. This review is meant to help and NOT hurt.

Personal Impressions~
*NoteP*          Your story takes an interesting twist. Good job

Plot, Conflict and Structure~
*NoteP*          Arlynn has been offered a job in the big city and tells her friend. Her friend wants to know what she's thinking. Ryan overhears the conversation and thinks she's going for the job. Doesn't want to be what holds Arlynn back. He's hurt because he thinks this is the end.

Conclusions~
*NoteP*          You did well writing this one. I would have like to see the fight instead of what brings them into the coming conflict. You've got a conflict coming between these two. I can't wait to see what happens.

*NoteP* Thank you for sharing and Keep Writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
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