Dear randyr – Welcome to Writing.com. I am glad you are a part of this amazing writing community now. I enjoyed reading "Invalid Item"  and I am glad to offer a few of the thoughts I had while reading your poem.
 
  FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Nearly an epic, certainly a story in song, though not quite a ballad, the lover is at first rescued and then loved unconditionally and the prose is a song of praise to both the woman and the god who brought life to one lost soul.
 
  THEME
 
At the end of everything, when all I am able to do is cry out to God for His mercy, sometimes deliverance comes in the form of an earthly angel, who won’t let me get away with my obstinate, selfish ways. She loves me to the point of restriction upon restriction until surrendering, I find contentment, blessing and joy forever. Above all she completes me and I am reassured of God’s love for me.
 
  STRUCTURE
 
Written in free, open verse the poem takes on a form one might call cascade. There is a sense of falling as the piece moves frenetically from one chronological event and image to the next. The order and cascading of images lends an eerie mystical feel to the poem, where even though my senses aren’t stirred to imagine each event I am beckoned to imagine the whole - the end result. A wife. A love. An eternity with purpose and everlasting hope.
 
  MY FAVORITE MOMENT
 
The story unfolds valiantly and this was my favorite moment:

You took an awful chance that day;
I could have been
anything at all

To all the women of the world who take a chance on a man, this one is for you! There is no safe harbor when expending oneself for the sake of another. Bambi is a sublime example of that heart in woman to give everything of themselves even though it may drive a man to moon madness; and in the end O how much more we love them because they took the ultimate risk.
 
 
  SUGGESTIONS
 
I enjoyed the poem just the way it is written. There are some critics who might suggest a more conventional form for your prose, but in the end, taking in the effect of the whole, I found your form and style to work wonderfully for my imagination.

  IN SUMMARY
 
"Invalid Item"  is a tribute to a blessed wife from a grateful husband. The narrative recounts the journey two people took, led by something greater than themselves to find the ultimate experience on earth - True Love! Thank you for sharing your gift. Write On!
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

♫~ Kenword~♫
 

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