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Review #4534059
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The Mystery at Mount St Cluedo Open in new Window. [ASR]
Flash fiction entry 02/22/2020. Must use the words "eyes, stripes, lamp". 297 words.
by Greg M Author Icon
Review by Angus Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*BalloonR* Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" Open in new Window.! *BalloonR*

Greetings, Greg M!
This is pretty good for a flash fiction piece! You did a great job with the description of the jail cell, as well as showing us how upset was about what friends would think of her *Shock2*. But the best part was the last two paragraphs. Not only did you give us her defense, but you also solved the 'mystery' as well!
Bravo! I knew it was Professor Plum all the time! *Laugh*
Great spelling and grammar, but I did see one tiny comma niggle (twice):
“What on Earth would the others be thinking?”(,) she contemplated' (don't need that comma)
“It’s all poppycock!”(,) she told herself' (same here — the question mark and the exclamation mark already signify the end of the 'sentence', so the comma isn't necessary)
Otherwise, nice job, my dear Watson. *Rolling*
Kee ponw ritin gon, Greg M, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here!
PS-And good luck in the contest! *Wink*

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#1300305 by Maryann Author IconMail Icon

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