Hello 💙 Carly- Hello 2025 ,

I just read your short story "Moving On" , which I found when posting for "I Write in 2019"  and wanted to share my personal thoughts with you.

Disclaimer: Please remember that the following suggestions are based off of my own opinion and personal interpretation of your work. Feel free to take and/or toss out any of my suggestions.



Since this is supposed to be based on something that actually has happened to you, I couldn't help but try and picture you as a little girl going through this (despite the story having to change the gender lol). I felt anxious with you yet excited for the new experience.

I was hooked right in with your first paragraph. I wanted to know why you were moving and what was going to happen with it.

I got curious about what was going to happen with your kitty since this was a main focus of yours in the story. I also wanted to know what was going to happen with your dad since you didn't even know if you'd get to spend time with him and when. Which of course led to the terrible news in your last paragraph. I can't imagine having to deal with all of that within such a short period of time at such a young age.




Thank you for sharing a personal memory with us! Even though some things were changed it was interesting getting a look into your past.

I enjoyed reading your work and hope my review was helpful and encouraging!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .