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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4382119
Review #4382119
Viewing a review of:
 Fear  [E]
This is my reaction to being in a car accident.
by Fromtheheart
Review of Fear  
Review by Angus
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings, Fromtheheart!
This isn't bad for your first piece on here, and having been in more than my share of car accidents myself, I can relate to this.
You did a good job of showing the reader the thoughts that were going through your mind as the car rolled over and over again. Faith and fear are both very strong emotions; they say that when we come close to dying we see our entire lives go by. I like your examples of faith, and to end it with that example of fear was well done. Traumatic experiences will do that to a person.
As for me, I've been a few roll-overs. The last one we rolled end for end about 5 times. It really did seem like slow motion; I didn't know if it was ever going to stop! We started out with a girl driving, me in the passenger seat, and my dog in the back seat. By the time we came to a stop (on all four wheels again), my dog was in the driver's seat and the girl and I were in the back seat!
Talk about a wild ride!
Good spelling and grammar, but I did spot a couple of niggles:
'For that small moment of time time the world moved in slow motion.'
'Faith wasn't the only thing that I finally can't to understand though.' (awkward sentence-missing word? Or perhaps you meant 'came to understand'?)
Otherwise, nice job.
Kee ponw ritin gon, Fromtheheart, and welcome to WdC! If you like to write, then you're going to love it here!
PS-You might want to get your biography set up so we can know a little something more about you (hobbies, favorite authors/books, location, etc.), but that's up to you, of course.
PPS-Since you’re new here, perhaps you’d like to check out "Noticing Newbies"  to get a feel of Writing.Com and introduce yourself to the community!

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