Hello Sue

This is an Angel Review   

Disclaimer:
These are only my opinions. Feel free to use what you find helpful and disregard the rest


And interesting poem. The sun so loved the moon that he died every night so she may live and shine.

The title is good, it catches the attention of the reader. It also lives up to my expectations of the poem. The rhythm and flow are okay. Could be better if the poem was broken into stanzas. There is a lot of good emotions and imagery. As I read each line I could see the story unfold.

I have a few suggestions to offer:
with drew make it one word, withdrew.
the could hear his lifeless body fall to the ground. they could hear . . .
Also the title should be capitalized.

Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed reading When the Moon Dies.
Keep on writing.


Gypsy Ann

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .