Wine, Baby [13+] A future husband and wife go on their first date. |
Hello, Cadie here reviewing on behalf of "Game of Thrones" I want to first welcome you to Writing.com (WDC). This is really great community to be a part of. Overall Impressions~ You're written an interesting poem. The description makes me wonder what's going on? I had to spin this in my head a couple of times in order get it. A future husband and wife, they will be married in the future. This is a picture of their first date. I think that's how I am to understand what you've written. With that in mind, here's what I don't understand. How a child comes from one glass of wine. It's like the characters drank too much and had a baby from the wine they drank. You describe the relationship after the baby is born then in the end feel that the child was a mistake. Maybe I've missed the meaning completely. Feel free to correct me. I don't understand the story in your poem. It doesn't seem complete or it's missing pieces. Conclusions~ You've got the beginnings of a good poem, I think it needs some tweaking. This was probably not a review you were expecting. I really mean you no harm in reviewing this. Thank you for sharing, Keep writing. My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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